im a Christian in that I believe in God and Jesus / the Bible and im also pretty liberal. I encourage you to find interpretations of the religion outside of only organized religion. Personally I have a lot of issues with organized religion and how people exploit the word of God to make themselves feel powerful. I guess I would say that exploring what a relationship with god outside the “traditional” American evangelical perspective looks like could be very beneficial for you
People like to cherry pick what they feel constitutes a sin. The important thing is to be respectful of one another and know that we all hold different beliefs. If religion is important to you don’t let anyone else tell you that your beliefs are any less valid just because you don’t hate the right things
Remember that this religion is over 2000 years old with so so many interpretations and translations. It can be hard when people use your religion to harm others but I hope that their actions don’t cause you to fall away from the core message, which is to love people and treat everyone with respect and dignity. That’s what it’s all about
As far as the being gay thing goes, you’ll find a lot of scholarly debate about the words and translations and all that but for me what I’ve chosen to believe is that god doesn’t make mistakes on sexuality or gender. I have so many gay friends and family and I choose to believe that my god doesn’t care who you love as long as you conduct yourself in the image of Christ. I would suggest looking into progressive pastors who can explain this wayyyy better than me
I think (correct me if im wrong) that you are having trouble separating Christianity as a religion from the politicized christianity of american evangelicalism (which is part of something called Christian nationalism). I hope that your faith journey leads you to discover the side of Christianity that hasn’t been weaponized by people desperate for control and power over the ones they claim to care about. Christianity is so much more than what some conservatives have co-opted it to be