Anonymous #1 3w

why do you care? its ops life, not yours and it doesn’t effect you at all

31

Anonymous #1 3w

I feel most comfortable with he/they pronouns, being referred to as more masculine, but I still like my femininity because I’ve accepted girlhood as a vital point in my life. I’ve matured past the “BOYS like blue and trucks, and GIRLS like pink and Barbie’s!” Phase when I was 20.

17

Anonymous OP 3w

I still love makeup, I love wearing wigs (because I will NEVER dye or bleach my hair cuz I don’t like how damaged and dead it looks and feels), and I love wearing dresses and presenting as feminine still.

15

Anonymous OP 3w

But despite all that, despite walking out of my house looking like THIS sometimes,

10

Anonymous OP 3w

I’ve found myself less associated with WOMANHOOD, and I don’t really wanna go into MANhood because I don’t really fw man culture like that. But I like the pronouns, and I do like a lot more masculine things.

21

Anonymous OP 3w

But like I said, I can pass without testosterone too. I wouldn’t say I’m gender fluid because even when feminine, whenever someone uses “she”, I actually wanna vomit, and I start tweaking 😭

9

But I’ve discovered that once you stop associating your validity with boy=blue and girl=pink, you’ll find your world to be a lot brighter and happier. But not everyone can do that, and I understand it’s hard. It took a lot of self growth and maturity to reach that point for me :).

20

Anonymous OP 3w

It’s just so exhausting people acting like I need to also be miserable and dysphoric because “I’m not supposed to like dresses if I’m a REAL trans man”. Dat Shi LAME 🙄💅🏽

18

Anonymous #1 3w

Trans guys can be feminine and love that side of themselves. Everyone is on a varying spectrum of identity and presentation, even you. There is zilch wrong with that.

19

Anonymous #4 3w

some people want to fully transition and permanently go on HRT, surgery, etc. and that’s cool! some people want to go on HRT for only a few years to get a deeper voice, some bottom growth, etc. and that’s cool! some people don’t want to medically transition at all and only socially transition, and that’s cool! and none of it is anyone else’s business to butt into

18

Anonymous OP 3w

today i learned that dysphoria that arises from cultural associations to certain actions/traits is immature and i should just grow the fuck up. the internet is truly a wonderful place. 😑😑😑 i wonder if there's anyone else who believes dysphoria is immature and you should just grow up instead of addressing it.

2

Anonymous #5 3w

You can choose be upset all you want about how I choose to perceive life. I didn’t say dysphoria is immature. I said boy=blue and girl=pink is immature, which is not the same thing. I get dysphoria. I get it in my chest, I get it when my deadname is called, I get it when I get misgendered, I get it around GENDER specific things. But why should I get it because I want to wear makeup and dresses?

8

Anonymous #5 3w

“You’re telling me that my dysphoria is immature.” Now you’re just stepping in dog shit 🙄. That’s not what I said, you just chose to be offended by how I chose to live MY life, and my explanation for why I live it that way.

7

Anonymous OP 3w

note that i said "dysphoria about cultural associations to certain actions and traits", not dysphoria in general. maybe you don't feel dysphoria in that way, but calling that dysphoria immature is hurtful. when everyone thinks boy means x trait, having x trait can make me feel like less of a woman because of the way people see and treat me. you seem not to feel the same way, and i respect that.

0

Anonymous #5 3w

This thought process is actually terrible and can also be applied to when cis men let toxic masculinity into their lives like treating violence like strength or viewing women as objects.

11

Anonymous #5 3w

Boy=blue and girl=pink is a world issue and not just a trans thing. I think that it has a massive contribution onto toxic masculinity, which is one of the biggest problems in the world rn. I’m not saying dysphoria is immature, I’m not even saying dysphoria about cultural associations is immature. I’m saying cultural associations on their own is immature.

10

Anonymous OP 3w

i think you think dysphoria is something i can control, like i can choose whether or not to feel dysphoric about these things. i can't eliminate this dysphoria without changing anything any more than i can the dysphoria that comes from my body without hrt.

0

Anonymous #5 3w

Also, “I wonder if there’s anyone else who believes dysphoria is immature and you should just grow up instead of addressing it.”? Don’t compare me to conservatives, and go back and say you respect me after I stood my ground.

9

Anonymous #5 3w

I know it can’t be controlled. But it can be worked on. I had dysphoria through the roof to the point where I would hate on feminine trans men because it made me feel “better” or like “one of the REAL ones” but I realized that I was just miserable, and I couldn’t even afford surgery for myself, and I was too young for HRT.

7

Anonymous OP 3w

Now I’m the prettiest boy in the world 🌸

5

Anonymous OP 3w

I worked REALLY hard to destroy that mindset because at the time, it was the only thing I could do to make myself grow as a person. It’s not easy and took me literally YEARS, almost a decade. And I did it to cope with the fact that I couldn’t get top surgery, but in doing so, I’ve made so much peace with myself and the world around me. I’m happier this way. I’m not forcing others to strive for this mindset, but it’s made me a lot happier, and a much better person in doing so.

8

Anonymous OP 3w

i respect that you don't feel dysphoria about these cultural associations. i don't respect that you think i am immature for it. you say you don't but you said not to associate validity with it, which is functionally the same as saying not to feel dysphoria about it. you then said you matured into that position, which implies that you think those that disagree with you in that way are immature.

-1

Anonymous #5 3w

Nigga I didn’t say YOU were immature 😭🙏🏽

10

Anonymous #5 3w

“You said this, which means this, which means this; in conclusion, you said this.” You went through so many steps to let my harmless comment ruin your mood. That’s what I call “stepping in dog shit.”

13

Anonymous OP 3w

this doesn't sound like that.

1

Anonymous OP 3w

"the curtains are just blue bro, the author didn't mean anything by deciding to add in that specific detail" i interpreted the text presented to me the same way i interpret most text i see. maybe it's because i'm autistic and tend to miss important shades of meaning if i don't.

0

Anonymous #5 3w

Cool. Let’s look over the text again. “Once you stop associating your VALIDITY with boy=blue and girl=pink.” Meaning, once you stop thinking “I really like basketball but sports are for boys so I’m not gonna play because if I play basketball, that makes me less valid as a girl”

12

Anonymous OP 3w

Then life will be happier. Like I said, it’s not easy. It’s hard as FUCK. But this mindset could also be projected onto other people. If you don’t wanna play basketball because sports are “for boys”, does that make ME a girl because I DON’T like basketball? No. It doesn’t.

8

Anonymous OP 3w

i heavily associate validity with dysphoria. when i feel validated, that diminishes dysphoria. when i feel dysphoric, my subconcious feelings of validity decrease. one can't really be isolated from the other. frustratingly, since dysphoria is caused mostly subconciously, it makes both dysphoria and feelings of validity difficult to control. this is basically why i said your argument seems to presume it's just a choice to feel dysphoric about certain things.

0

Anonymous OP 3w

also you saying my mindset leads to the mindset of toxic masculinity and men being violent to women is a crazy thing to say to a trans woman.

1

Anonymous #5 3w

It’s true 🤷🏽‍♂️. I was providing examples but that was the most extreme one. I can give feminine examples of why this is a bad thing too.

5

Anonymous #5 3w

this is real life not an english class, and a conversation is not a book report. this is completely irrelevant. The only interpretation that matters is OPs because they’re the one describing themselves

1

Anonymous #2 3w

writing on a public platform weans other people can see what you write. sure the events that matter can be decided by the poster, but every person who sees it can interpret it differently. i go to college at a relatively conservative school. if i interpret people making bigoted jokes they'll say "i wasn't being bigoted, i was just making a joke." by your argument, in that case i should just concede because the author has the only interpretation that matters

0

Anonymous #5 3w

dawg theres a difference between being bigoted and speaking about it ones own experience and if you cant tell the difference thats on you

2

Anonymous #2 3w

that was not the point. the point was that the person who writes something doesn't have the final say on interpretation, and i used an example.

0

Anonymous #5 3w

you used a bad example with a false equivalence. if someone is talking about their own life you cant just say “but i interpreted your life differently”

3

Anonymous #2 3w

he used his personal life to make a point about larger, more universal experiences. also, what do you mean you can't interpret things that happen in people's lives differently? if some pastor says "i will teach my kids that god controls everything because i've seen him in my own life", is it wrong for atheists to interpret his life as not really evidence for god?

0

Anonymous #5 3w

why are you fighting SO HARD to make everything anyone says to you offensive or an attack???

4