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Trans Talk 4w
Tell me why my (trans!) boyfriend is the one having the hardest time with my name change?? Over a year in and he’s the only one deadnaming me on occasion
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10
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Anonymous 4w

Nah that’s not acceptable. My partner and I have known each other since we were 13, I came out (ftm) at 17. Ever since I told him my new name he’s only ever called me by my real name, except a few times when I first came out he used a similar sounding name bc he forgot if it was that name or my name lmao (still a masculine name though). Try talking with him and see if there’s a mental block preventing him from changing

upvote 15 downvote
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Anonymous 4w

Family, coworkers, friends, even people I haven’t seen in ages. All do it right. He corrects himself, sure, but still…

upvote 13 downvote
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Anonymous 4w

I’m inclined to agree with #1, especially because it only seems to happen when he’s high. Which he’s understandable rather high as he recovers from top surgery. We’ve been together for about 4 years at this point, since before I started medically transitioning 3 years ago. It is also, thankfully, not my true deadname. I used it in the pup scene, having created it from two other names. Until I looked it up and found it’s an actual middle eastern name, and I’m very much not.

upvote 10 downvote
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Anonymous 4w

A year is a while, I start naming my friends not even my partner correctly even two weeks after they switch their name. Good luck with your situation and put your happiness first

upvote 2 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 4w

It genuinely just could be cause he has such a close emotional attachment to you. He def isn’t doing it on purpose. But unconsciously all the good feels he has with you were attached to your deadname. And so consciously he could be trying but it might take a lil longer for it to change in his brain unconsciously.

upvote 4 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #1 4w

nah, no excuses for doing that shit still after a YEAR. i’d legit consider dumping someone if they couldn’t get that shit sorted. my roommate of 3 years in college and best friend is a cis guy and when i came out our senior year he has since then deadnamed me by mistake once, in like 2-3 years and we talk all the time. yall need to set higher bars for the people in your lives fr.

upvote 24 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #2 4w

^this. how long have y’all been together cause a year is way too long for this to be happening.

upvote 14 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #4 4w

But if it were me, I’d leave his ass. As you continue to transition, someone deadnaming you could expose your deadname to harmful people

upvote 9 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 4w

I don’t really want to leave him, because that means leaving his wife too, and there’s talks of marriage on the table (ceremonial since poly marriages aren’t a thing here). It will certainly be a discussion soon, and one to be had while he’s sober. I consider it something to work on and correct, rather than just up and leave

upvote 5 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #3 4w

right? ppl gotta have more self respect and not tolerate being treated like dirt

upvote 2 downvote