Trans Talk on Sidechat | gay transguy here; does anyone else worry about not being seen as a guy by other queer men? or just men in general? they could affirm your gender as a boy as much as they want but deep down they see you as just a *transguy* and not a *guy*.

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Trans Talk 17h

gay transguy here; does anyone else worry about not being seen as a guy by other queer men? or just men in general? they could affirm your gender as a boy as much as they want but deep down they see you as just a *transguy* and not a *guy*.

Anonymous 15h

YES. all the time. I use Grindr a lot but recently I've been deleting the app off my phone a lot because I have the sense that gay guys I hook up with aren't seeing me as a guy in the way I am

Anonymous 16h

idc what they see me as “deep down”. as long as you refer to me the way i want to be referred to and you treat me with respect, then we’re good. if someone’s got shit to say to me, then i’m out and they can continue being miserable. there’s plenty of guys out there that see me as just some dude

Anonymous

#2 15h

and the shitty part is that in a sense it is true. the "trans" label DOES change how people view you, the same way any new information will. it's often a minute difference but can feel very big to us trans people specifically

Anonymous

#1 13h

don’t know why this is unpopular 🤷‍♂️ who cares what other people think about you

Anonymous

#1 12h

i agree…i think the main distinction for me is, if you’re a close friend or a partner i want you to see me for my true self. if you don’t even after i’ve given you many opportunities to see and understand me, i’m going to feel uncomfortable in the relationship and probably distance myself. but if it’s anyone else i don’t give a fuck, and if anyone disrespects me i’m out

Anonymous

#3 12h

that’s how i feel about it. those who i feel deserve to know that part of my life will eventually know. otherwise, i know who i am and no one will ever will ever make me doubt myself, especially someone who was never going to respect my identity anyways. if a friend treats me differently after i come out and refuses to change, then they were never my friend