Roommate Rants on Sidechat | Is it valid to not want guys that you don’t know being in your room? I feel bad for telling my roommate no, but I just don’t feel comfortable having guys that I don’t know in the room. I’m okay with girls but sometimes. For reference we’re girls

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Roommate Rants 1d

Is it valid to not want guys that you don’t know being in your room? I feel bad for telling my roommate no, but I just don’t feel comfortable having guys that I don’t know in the room. I’m okay with girls but sometimes. For reference we’re girls

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Anonymous 1d

I mean…if you guys share a room, there will of course be people you don’t know. How could you possibly know all her friends? I think it’s lowk not reasonable. You can leave the room if it makes you uncomfortable. A fair request would be asking her to always be present when someone is in the room

Anonymous 1d

at least she's asking instead of leaving the door unlocked all night so random men can just come in whenever 😀😀😀

Anonymous 1d

ur valid for that

Anonymous 22h

If they ask you if they can come over then tenichally yes it’s your right, but when you want someone over don’t be surprised when they say no out of pettiness. this IS also their room too

Anonymous 22h

Yes it’s valid. One of my roommates didn’t even ask and just said her “homeboys” are gonna come over and that if they didn’t feel like driving they were staying in the dorm. I told her that I wouldn’t be comfortable with that and that I didn’t know who the fuck they are and she got mad and got all pissy because I used the word fuck. But I used it to get my point across and she threatened me that if she started cussing RAs would need to get involved pretty much

Anonymous 22h

Your room it’s valid

Anonymous 22h

You’re so valid bc you have no idea what their intentions are

Anonymous 20h

yes fuck bitches who do this

Anonymous 20h

That’s totally valid. If I dont know the person regardless of how close or not my roommate is with them, I don’t want them.

Anonymous 20h

Valid, I’m a guy and I don’t like it when random guys show up. I prolly wouldn’t say no bc there’s no gender difference, but I would say no if I felt they would disrespect me or not respect my/our living space.

Anonymous 12h

As a guy this is completely understandable especially in a traditional style dorm, there are common areas for a reason

Anonymous 19h

if she’s asking ahead of time, it’s your room and safe space. and you have the right to want it to stay like that. but she also had the right to ask for friends to come over. if her and him are close friends, maybe ask to him him ahead of time to get to know him. but maybe just try to find some common ground?

Anonymous 15h

idk bro but if it were me i’d also take into account its my room too, meaning you’re allowed to say no, if you do then they can’t have a guest(s) over and if they still bring them over that’s a conversation for u and ur RA

Anonymous

#3 23h

Why are you supposed to leave the room you are paying for I hate when ppl say that. The reasonable thing will be telling her roommate to notify her when ppl are coming over to the room

Anonymous

#4 23h

It sounds like she’s not comfortable with the idea AT ALL. Which is beyond just a notification

Anonymous

#2 22h

Absolutely not, call the cops when that happens

Anonymous

#7 20h

No idea what girls intentions are either

-6

Anonymous

#9 20h

Less likely to be attacked by a woman than a man

Anonymous

#3 20h

Most girls would agree that it should be perfectly reasonable for a girl to be uncomfortable with a man in her ROOM, where she sleeps. Most girls I know would be incredibly understanding and not bring a man into another girls room if she’s uncomfortable. That’s just basic respect and decency. It’s her room, and she has every right to not want a specific person in there. There are plenty of places her roommate can go to hang out with her friends.

Anonymous

#6 20h

Tell her that’s fine bc having random dudes spend the night is against the rules??

Anonymous

#7 19h

I don’t think it is for my school because were aloud 24 hour guests but if the others say no then you can’t but we even said it as ahead of time thing. But like if I don’t know them then I don’t want them over

Anonymous

#8 18h

Yeah but I never told her no before because she’s had friends over before. But there is this one time she brought a guy into the room without me knowing. This time she asked and I told her that I was uncomfortable with guys being in the room

Anonymous

#3 18h

I specifically mean guys because I’m just not comfortable having boys/guys over and we talked about this in our agreement. I’ve never told her no before because she’s had friends over before. But there is this one time she brought a guy into the room without me knowing. This time she asked and I told her that I was uncomfortable with boys/guys being in the room

Anonymous

OP 18h

yeah no… if they don’t ask theres definitely a problem bc thats not respecting your shared space

Anonymous

#6 18h

Your roommate is a terrible and inconsiderate person

Anonymous

OP 17h

They are still her friends? You’re not her mother. It’s a shared space. If you can have friends over, so can she. Not every guy out there is a pos. Give your roommate some grace and trust that she has self respect to not keep horrible dudes around

-9

Anonymous

#3 17h

it’s a shared space, meaning you don’t get to just bring anybody to the room if the other person isn’t okay with it. I don’t think i’ve ever had a roommate that’s been comfortable with guys in our room. I’ve ALWAYS been respectful of their comfortability.

Anonymous

#15 15h

also this is not me saying “tell her no every time” but maybe have a conversation about wanting to know in advance and maybe even at a time when you’re not there or something!