Relationship Advice on Sidechat | Kinda at a loss w my relationship rn. I love my bf, I don’t want to lose him and we also live together but he doesn’t initiate affection or try to be romantic or physical w me. Atp I jst use my vibe when he’s not home, I don’t feel wanted anymore idk wtd

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Relationship Advice 4w

Kinda at a loss w my relationship rn. I love my bf, I don’t want to lose him and we also live together but he doesn’t initiate affection or try to be romantic or physical w me. Atp I jst use my vibe when he’s not home, I don’t feel wanted anymore idk wtd

Anonymous 4w

There’s no compliment idk when the last time he told me ily without me saying it first. He acts annoyed when I am over affectionate but that’s me compensating for the affection and emotion he isn’t giving me. Idk how to communicate this stuff w him but I think these things r basics in relationships shouldn’t he jst have common sense that yes u should try to make ur gf feel loved and cared for?

Anonymous 4w

This was an issue I had with my previous relationship. I take full responsibility but at a certain point I stopped giving affection, not necessarily because I no longer thought my ex was beautiful and amazing, but simply because life got in the way. School and work wore me down, and all I cared about atp was being in her presence, though it would have went a long way to make her feel that. Ultimately what I’m trying to get at is that if he is not initiating affection. Is it HIS fault.

Anonymous 4w

That sort of thing doesn’t change and it’ll just make you feel frustrated.

Anonymous 4w

Have a sit-down conversation and see how he responds to all of it. To How you feel and whatnot. Maybe there’s deeper things going on

Anonymous

OP 4w

How old is he?

Anonymous

#1 4w

Anonymous

OP 4w

Im 25M. 23 is starting to push the barrier of ‘hey you are not fully grown yet, but you should be able to start recognizing the emotional needs of your partner’. If you want advice from someone who is in an extremely similar situation, the first step is to have a conversation with him. Write down what you are feeling in notes, maybe schedule a time to talk. Things won’t get better if he doesn’t know. See what he’s thinking (if he is at all).

Anonymous

#2 4w

And that it is something HE needs to be better about if he cares for you. But it also goes a long way if you make your needs heard if you haven’t already. Sometimes we get so caught up in our stuff we forget those essentials. It doesn’t make it less his fault, but as nicely as possible, coming from experience. A good kick in the ass might set things right again

Anonymous

#2 4w

Because hopefully it’ll remind him that despite what’s going on his life(if anything) that it’s never important enough to take away time from loving his partner and making them feel seen. Now, if nothing is going on. And he just has stopped showing you affection. Hopefully a call out will at least cause him to acknowledge this, and result in you finding something better. Because you deserve love, and if he loves you, he’ll make sure you’re getting it

Anonymous

#2 4w

Or maybe, there’s a reason he’s withdrawn himself, and when discussing it he’ll bring up why. No matter what. Having the hard conversation is what’s going to help YOU. Even if it’s at a detriment to the relationship. And that’s okay

Anonymous

#2 4w

I hope that makes sense? Idk

Anonymous

#4 4w

I had a similar situation and found out there was a lot more going on.. we are now in therapy and trying to fix things

Anonymous

#4 4w

Like what going on?

Anonymous

#5 4w

Disloyalty. In more ways than one. And it pushed him away emotionally and he was basically checked out of our relationship for months because he outsourced everything. Sex, connection, validation. All because he has insecurity problems. Doesn’t mean you did anything wrong tho if this is the case for you

Anonymous

#5 4w

But he told me that me moving in and getting close made him feel bored of the relationship. Even when I did everything right. So just talk to him and see what’s up.

Anonymous

#5 4w

Or maybe your bf has personal things going on which are making him avoidant. Stress from life, anxiety, depression, that sort of thing.