Anonymous #1 7w

Exactly! My mom tells me I can set boundaries, but when I do it becomes a spectacle. When I’m upset about something, she tells me I’m an angry person and that I bully her. I’m 21 and have lived on my own for 3 years but I’m still constantly parented, expected to call every day and judges for my interests. I get anxious about calling and I often just call to get it out of the way so I stop thinking about it, but that enforces the loop

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Anonymous OP 7w

So you’re calling to relieve your anxiety about their response to you not calling. So an exposure is not “please stop asking me to call” the exposure is sitting with the anxiety of not making the phone call

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Anonymous #1 7w

Definitely sounds like a very frustrating and stressful situation :(

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Anonymous #1 7w

exactly exactly!!!! Because if I don’t call, I typically can expect a text that says “hope you’re alive. I’m going to bed now.” And it’s so jarring I dread it, and then I anxiously check my phone to see if that text has come yet. Im trying so hard to break the cycle

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Anonymous OP 6w

I wish you the best in detaching from the need to please your family to your own detriment. it's hard as hell when they make you feel guilty for just setting boundaries. for exposures my therapist tells me to say to myself "maybe [obsession will happen], maybe not" and then don't do the compulsion. so i'd say you could try "maybe my mom will get mad, maybe not" and/or "maybe she's right about me, maybe she isn't, but i'm not doing anything about it"

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Anonymous #2 6w

OOH I LIKE THIS TY

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