Anonymous #1 2d

I called 988 later that night. I tried to convince her to, but she refused. She is a legal adult, so I cannot force her to get medical help, and she is not willing to go with me. I looked into what I can do in terms of involuntary commitment if push came to shove, but online had conflicting info and the 988 people said there’s nothing I can do since she is an adult. I am doing all that I can right now, but she is headstrong and independent, and if I push something on her she is liable to get in-

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Anonymous #1 2d

Her car and just drive away. We don’t get along too well all the time, so it’s not like we have a great rapport that I can use to stabilize her. I have suicide intervention training and am using all the skills I can to work with her but mental health runs deep in my family and she is, like I am, very mentally ill. She feels she’s reasoned her way into her current stance, and nothing I was saying was really affecting her. The best I could get was having her give me at least 1 more week

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Anonymous #1 2d

I have been suicidal for much of the last decade, as has she, so I understand the gravity of the situation which is why I’m in such distress rn. She is stubborn, and I know that if I call emergency services right now and they don’t end up doing anything she’ll shut me out and I won’t have any way to stay updated on her plans.

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Anonymous OP 2d

it sounds like an incredibly tough situation, i’m truly sorry. if she’s actively suicidal and refusing help, you should call 911 and ask for a wellness check. tell them she’s expressing suicidal thoughts and won’t go voluntarily. they can take her to the hospital for evaluation, even if she’s an adult. every state has a process for emergency psychiatric holds when someone’s in danger. i know it’s hard, but her safety comes first.

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Anonymous #1 2d

She was involuntarily committed for an eating disorder 5 years ago, and that was not a pleasant experience for her, so any effort I made to suggest seeking help was very staunchly declined

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Anonymous OP 2d

that makes a lot of sense, and it’s understandable she’s resistant after going through something traumatic like that. involuntary treatment can be really hard. sometimes the least harmful option still ends up being the one that keeps someone alive long enough to heal. if she’s in danger and refusing all help, it’s okay to reach out for emergency support again, you can explain her past experience to responders so they approach her with more care.

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Anonymous OP 2d

and please don’t forget about your own wellbeing in this. you’re doing so much to keep her safe while managing your own pain, and that’s an enormous emotional load. it’s okay to take moments to breathe or to reach out for your own support. you’re not failing her, you’re trying to save her.

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Anonymous #1 2d

I’m getting her to stay talking to me now about our plays next week, where I’ll be having her spend the night from the 17-18th, and I’m going to be staying alert for any signs that she isn’t actually planning to follow through. At the moment it seems like she is planning to come, and I will use that time to reassess. If she is still certain about committing this month, I plan to call emergency services. I’ll also be keeping in contact with her this week and if I feel anything off I’ll call too.

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Anonymous #1 2d

Thank you for talking with me about this, I just feel so trapped and overwhelmed

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Anonymous OP 2d

Inst actually planning to follow through on our plan for next week* to clarify

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Anonymous OP 2d

of course, not a problem. i was an EMT and i’ve also worked in the ER and psych ward for dozens of suicide cases, and unfortunately have been in this situation myself. it’s really heavy and painful to handle especially when it comes to a loved one. you’re a really good sibling for looking out for her and your efforts are seen and appreciated. keep the community updated if you need anything or if the situation has changed. we’re not professionals but we’re always here to talk :)

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