Anonymous mother_russia 3w

ok sure probably. but i liked her before she came out to me and by the time she did i was already falling for someone who im still with and love very deeply. i feel very trapped by everything and awful when she shows me another tinder profile that looks just like me. and even worse when we lived together for a couple years and just recently live in different states and she wants these girls that look just like me to do all the things we did

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Anonymous OP 3w

Okay so since you don’t live in the same state, can I ask why it bothers you to see her going to places she enjoys with her girlfriends? She’s clearly filling a void that you left behind and needing people to hang out with since she can’t be with you.

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Anonymous OP 3w

I’m confused why this is making you feel trapped. Are you wanting to stop being friends with her? Or are you feelings guilty for moving or something?

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Anonymous mother_russia 3w

bc i don’t literally want to be replaced by a girl that looks and acts like me. there are thousands of lesbians with literally every aesthetic/vibe and she claims to want mascs but always ends up with someone that looks just like me. and idk how to bring it up to her without sounding rude or like im trying to start shit. this is my college roomate, this is someone i want in my life forever, this is not a relationship im willing to ruin but it does make me uncomfortable/frustrated

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Anonymous OP 3w

So you would rather be replaced in that sense with someone who is less like you?

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Anonymous OP 3w

Ehh idk let her live her live. If she likes that person then she likes that person. Seems a bit unfair to police this

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Anonymous #2 3w

you don’t think it would make you uncomfortable watching your best friend only choose people that look just like you/have the same music taste/hobbies/interests? like i’m talking down to the hair color/cut and glasses. i want her to be happy and have community and fall in love a million times, but i don’t think it’s crazy to be a bit uncomfortable by watching her seek out carbon copies of me

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Anonymous OP 3w

and the last thing we want to do is police it! it’s not like i’m going to call her and tell her she can’t date someone bc she looks a little bit like me, that would be crazy. but i think it’s also valid to notice that she only ever wants girls that look (AND ACT) like me

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Anonymous OP 3w

I mean, unless you are incredibly unique in a way that no else is then no not really. People have types and date people are of a similar demeanor because they like to relate to people who like certain things

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Anonymous OP 3w

And if they truly are dating that many people that are so similar to you then the similar features must be relatively common

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Anonymous OP 3w

it’s also like, not exactly her choice? even if you have a nice conversation and she totally understands what you mean, do you expect her to consider “oh maybe this person is too much like my friend” before going on a date?? If she likes someone and they like her back, that’s just how it is

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Anonymous #3 3w

Especially for gay people. It’s not like we have unlimited options here 😭

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