LGBTQIA+ on Sidechat | genuine question, how does sexual attraction feel for you? i’m trying to figure out if i’m ace or if i do experience it and just don’t know what it is

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LGBTQIA+ 1w

genuine question, how does sexual attraction feel for you? i’m trying to figure out if i’m ace or if i do experience it and just don’t know what it is

Anonymous 1w

I'm asexual but I still enjoy sex. personally I simply like sex because it feels good, but nothing about my partners appearance elevates it for me like it doesnt matter how attractive someone is, nothing about them or their body turns me on or illicit sexual thoughts in me. like actions can turn me on (love to be thrown around lol) but nothing about that is me being attracted to how someone looks

Anonymous 1w

Bi graysexual here. Used to think I was ace. For me it’s just like, damn that person’s shapely. I wanna bite, lick & touch. Or god, they’re so smart/dorky/generally hot. I wanna rub up against them until our bodies become one. not to be vulgar, but that’s how I experience it. 😵‍💫

Anonymous 1w

As someone who is aroace, when I was trying to figure this stuff, I thought of people I found aesthetically attractive and then asked myself if wanted to a list of physically intimate things with them (ie holding hands, making out, more sexual things). Pretty much my reaction to every item on this list was either neutrality or disgust/discomfort.

Anonymous 1w

I confused platonic attraction for romantic/sexual attraction for years. For me the romantic and sexual attraction are tied together. Like when I’m attracted to someone I really want to do different romantic gestures like buying them flowers and I will think about kissing the person an sex with the person and I know I’m attracted to someone in that way when I get really giddy to be around them and I get physically turned on as well

Anonymous

#1 1w

ok so it’s actually a feeling of like wanting physical contact and stuff? bc i have found people attractive but never felt like i wanted to touch them or have sex w them

Anonymous

OP 1w

that's the sexual part of sexual attraction imo. otherwise you're just into them romantically

Anonymous

#2 1w

LOL ok guess i’m ace then, tbh i always thought romantic attraction would be more about personality etc and sexual attraction was the looks based side of things

Anonymous

#3 1w

tbh everything from making out and further have always been kind of gross to me in theory but i’ve always been told that it feels different “in the moment”

Anonymous

OP 1w

I mean, same here. But like idk, I trust how I feel about things. Maybe if I ever meet someone I really like and they want to try it, I’d give a shot. But rn, I feel comfortable saying I’m ace. I think it really depends on you whether you want to experiment or not. You don’t have to figure everything out immediately 😊

Anonymous

#3 1w

Also, asexuality is a spectrum. And even the aces who fall on the sex neutral or sex repulsed side of things may still do physically intimate stuff w/their partner bc it makes their partner happy and they feel comfortable tolerating it for their partner. Really just depends on the person