Anonymous #3 8w

your reality is not everyone else’s

2

Anonymous #1 8w

cause it’s a result of this overcorrection in queer spaces where attraction is ephemeral and beautiful as long as it involves a woman or fem-presenting people, but the second it involves attraction to men or masc-presenting people it’s got this undertone of “ew” to it. it’s something i’ve even seen transmen talk about experiencing post-transition. why are we as a community ashamed of who we’re attracted to when society already is trying to make us feel like shit for it?

5

Anonymous #1 8w

its an unhelpful stereotype that i wish people would spend time unpacking. but instead ill probably get someone telling me it “isn’t that deep”.

10

Anonymous OP 8w

…what queer spaces are you in? Like I have no idea what you’re talking about with the “undertone of ew” thing. Is it in lesbian spaces, I’m nonbinary with a beard (as in facial hair lol) so I’m not really in tune with that sphere of queer culture

3

Anonymous OP 8w

The actual reason is rooted in how women are sexualized nonstop but men aren’t, btw

5

Anonymous #3 8w

Not going to dox myself, but i live in a large city with a significant queer population. So those spaces. It’s also a sentiment i see online - not something people usually acknowledge outright (bc broadly speaking if you’re a guy and you complain about it it makes you come off as incel-adjacent) until you bring their attention to it, but it happens.

5

Anonymous #3 8w

i agree that this is part of it, no need to be condescending. to be more specific, men’s bodies are desexualized almost entirely. a woman naked is something to be lusted after. a naked man is a joke (this statement requires MUCH more nuance, but i am limited by word count).

8

Anonymous OP 8w

I wasn’t intending to seem condescending, sorry!

1

Anonymous #3 8w

it’s fine. tone is hard to convey on the internet. it’s also difficult to have these discussions as they are multilayered. there is a racial aspect to this as well - rarely do i see these people mention black men in their attraction, for instance. it happens, but it’s usually white men.

9

Anonymous OP 8w

But like, in what context I mean? Like gay bars, queer activist organizations, queer-focused hobby groups (like book clubs or gardening clubs or whatever)?

4