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LGBTQIA+ 6w

I COULDN’T HAVE SAID IT BETTER OMG.

2901

Anonymous 6w

I think that it would be better not to assume gender & not to assume every bodies gender just because “it’s normal” & to refer to people neutrally until you know , but assuming isn’t something we should hold against people & just correct yourself if you do assume and get it wrong .

158

Anonymous 6w

It’s basic human psychology to assume things about someone as our brain tries to efficiently zone them into boxes shaped by our experiences and opinions. It’s normal, and typically completely harmless. It’s a fair assumption to think the person wearing a frilly dress, pink hair, full makeup, AFAB walking out of the all girls dorm would use she/her pronouns. Its harmful when you treat them differently, insult them, think less of them, and refuse to adopt their preferred pronoun use when corrected

Anonymous 6w

I’m always so anxious about accidentally misgendering someone when I first meet them or if I don’t know them that well and this made me feel better

Anonymous 6w

queen deltarune mention

Anonymous 6w

Most based post on this community istg

Anonymous 6w

Based Queen

Anonymous 6w

I am nonbinary. I’m not offended when people assume my gender because thats the norm and not necessarily harmful but I deliberately refer to people by their names only or neutrally until they confirm their pronouns.

Anonymous 6w

Based Queen Deltarune take

Anonymous 2w

EXACTLY

Anonymous

#1 6w

i agree with you that it WOULD be better, however, as an american it is hard to break down the culture that surrounds us which is the fact that we are taught to assume regardless. this is a thing that is ingrained very deeply from a young age, and even as a nonbinary person myself, it is hard for me to battle with the thoughts in my mind when i assume about my own self identity or my friend's identities. it would be better, but that doesn't mean its feasible to happen in the next few years

231

Anonymous

#4 6w

On point

Anonymous 6w

that.. is exactly my point. i was saying it takes conscious effort however the original commenter was phrasing it in a way as if we can just flip a switch and suddenly, everyone in the world will stop assuming. i agree with you, friend! i am trying!

Anonymous

#1 6w

Nah as a trans person I would have a bad time being referred to neutrally by default. Please assume my gender

Anonymous

#1 6w

i mean referring to someone neutrally is still assuming in some ways, and like someone else said in the thread, it makes some people feel bad. i try to remain neutral w it but there are flaws in that as well

Anonymous 6w

You can disagree but you’re still wrong. Someone here has already said it’s uncomfortable to be referred to neutrally. There are genuinely people in this world who it does upset to use they/them pronouns with (esp trans people since many get referred to as they/them even after expressing their identities and pronoun preferences as an insult). It’s nice to assume neutrality, but it’s still flawed. There’s genuinely no “perfect”solution, just one that is most kind

Anonymous

#9 6w

please k

-5

Anonymous 6w

It’s can be invalidating for many reasons, one of which is possible transphobic roots yes.

Anonymous 6w

It can. If I put a lot of effort into presenting myself a certain way, and have been struggling with self acceptance and feelings of passing, someone using gender neutral pronouns even when trying to be nice and not assume can be super triggering bc you’re still not being perceived the way you’re desperately trying to present as. But like you said, it’s best to ask those things when you first meet someone to avoid that situation all together