LGBTQIA+ on Sidechat | Why is it controversial to say that queer people are entitled to safe spaces away from non queer people.Genuinely just got told I’m entitled for saying queer people deserve a space free from thier oppressors because “what about allies and closeted people”

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LGBTQIA+ 2w

Why is it controversial to say that queer people are entitled to safe spaces away from non queer people.Genuinely just got told I’m entitled for saying queer people deserve a space free from thier oppressors because “what about allies and closeted people”

1272

Anonymous 2w

it’s literally just this comic. this is what happens every single time

479

Anonymous 2w

If you are closeted and worried about being found out then maybe you should wait till you are in safe place in life to enter an OPENLY QUEER SPACE meant for OPENLY QUEER PEOPLE. It’s not Openly queer people’s jobs to make closeted people feel safe and hidden in their space away from non queer people when they are in a safe space meant for openly queer people. And allies are literally just NOT QUEER. Why is this so hard to understand 😭

289

Anonymous 2w

if you are really an ally you would let queer people have spaces to themself

187

Anonymous 2w

The allies thing is so dumb. If you’re an ally you should understand. If you’re genuinely upset by it, you’re clearly being an “ally” for the wrong reasons. You don’t get a medal or a prize

137

Anonymous 2w

I agree that there needs to be special spaces, but I dont agree with them being for only openly queer people. But like having, say, a rainbow room or a queer commons at a college/school is a good thing.

Anonymous 2w

My issue is this usually becomes a witch hunt for people who don’t look queer to *you*.

Anonymous 2w

I feel like both kinds of spaces should exist. This seems like it’s only an issue because of a (real or perceived? idk) scarcity of spaces made for us.

Anonymous 2w

understand this but also depends on the circumstance. u never know the battles that someone may be facing, it’s also difficult to assume someone isn’t queer just because they don’t appear to be. but i can understand OP

Anonymous 2w

So Are closeted people not queer anymore? Hello??? People are so insanely uneducated

Anonymous 2w

THANK YOU!!!

Anonymous 2w

I have no problem with any group wanting their own space. In fact I’ve been sad with the new anti-DEI laws that force “everyone welcome” to be printed on all events because I don’t go anymore because I don’t know if that’s actually the case.

Anonymous 2w

It’s controversial because people don’t like the idea of safe spaces. When people say ‘What about allies?’, what are they really saying? If they’re an ally themselves, then they should recognize that the spaces they occupy with LGBTQ+ people are inherently unsafe for a lot of different reasons. Also, LGBTQ+ safe spaces are few and far between. Pride events are always welcome to everyone, including allies and people who are closeted/questioning.

Anonymous 2w

Yes but also people should not try to put that on businesses/spaces that have never said they are for queer people only. For instance Splash is not complaining about all the money they get from closeted people and allies

Anonymous 2w

you had me in the first half

-16

Anonymous

OP 2w

this is not crazy to say idk. someones life and wellbeing is more important than going to a social gathering. if you're closeted, then maybe going to an openly queer space isn't the best idea to stay closeted. it isn't my concern to keep you closeted, not if it comes at the cost of opening queer safe spaces up to anyone and everyone. that defeats the entire purpose of a safe space for queer people

142

Anonymous

#1 2w

to elaborate bc there's weird takes in these comments I don't stand by- I agree with the post but people should not have to be out **outside of queer spaces** to be welcome, and peoples privacy should be standard ex: what happens in queer-only spaces should stay in queer only spaces, don't post pics without permission, don't bring up people's names and orientation outside of those spaces without permission

Anonymous

#17 2w

Literally just happened to me

Anonymous

#17 2w

Besides mlm things “queer space” usually translates to “must be afab or extremely feminine in personality and look”

Anonymous

OP 2w

I do feel like it can be used as a step towards acceptance of yourself and coming out, coming out doesn’t need to be the whole world knowing so going to events or spaces for queer people can definitely be a opportunity to try exploring that side and testing the water of the community, at the end of the day it’s the persons decision to do that and they shouldn’t be shunned or excluded because they arnt at the same stage as others or look the part.

Anonymous

#20 2w

It’s not our job to make closeted people feel hidden or protected but I do feel we should at least try to make them feel welcome as this can be their first attempt at coming to terms with who they are and we can serve as a good example of what the queer community is for its members

Anonymous

#1 2w

They don’t have to be out outside of the queer space, but I think they’re saying they should be queer to enter said space

Anonymous

#22 2w

that's not the vibes I was getting from OP's comment but it is nice to see so many people saying that

Anonymous

#18 2w

this. even though i’m afab i still get shit from other queer folks bc i’m not feminine

Anonymous

#1 2w

So I agree on this and I’m honestly really confused on what you think I said that contradicts that. Not sure what you mean but “outside” of queer spaces or where you got that from either, not being rude i promise I’m just genuinely wondering. I think that questioning and closeted queer people ca definitely be part of queer spaces and yes things should be confidential etc but openly queer people shouldn’t have to bend to extremes or hinder their own openness to make closeted people feel safe.

Anonymous

#1 2w

Closeted people too deserves safe spaces and confidentiality 100% but I think that they should probably stick to closeted specific safe spaces for thier own safety and security/privacy. I want to make it clear I believe all queer people should be allowed in safe spaces, not just afabs etc like other comments tried to imply. By queer I mean ALL lgbtqia+ people. I don’t like that a lot of queer spaces advertise themselves as safe but then don’t include transfem people or gay men etc.

Anonymous

#26 2w

Agreed, pride is a celebration for that includes everyone. I was specifically talking about safe spaces.

Anonymous

#14 2w

Where did I say that? Can you read??? If a closeted person is putting themselves in danger by being in openly queer spaces it’s not bad to say maybe they shouldn’t be in those spaces till they can SAFELY and not also put other people in danger.

Anonymous

OP 2w

I see what you’re trying to say, and I think that’s a decent point but also a lot of queer people that are closeted find safety in the communities, and learn how to find safety overall through them