LGBTQIA+ on Sidechat | i’m ngl it kinda bothers me as a trans person when you’re in a group and give your name and pronouns and cis people say like “i use xyz pronouns”. like no i don’t just use he/him pronouns my pronouns ARE he/him

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LGBTQIA+ 4d

i’m ngl it kinda bothers me as a trans person when you’re in a group and give your name and pronouns and cis people say like “i use xyz pronouns”. like no i don’t just use he/him pronouns my pronouns ARE he/him

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Anonymous 4d

I lowkey say “I use cuz pronouns” because I don’t know what my pronouns actually even are

Anonymous 4d

i don’t understand how this isn’t just splitting hairs over how others identify; can you explain why it’s upsetting?

Anonymous 4d

I don’t really like giving out pronouns like that to a group anyway, especially when you like go around and all give them out. To me it’s like “oh everyone look at the trans person!”

Anonymous 4d

the one feiend thats too woke

Anonymous 4d

so both can be true at the same time and it actually doesn't matter what word somebody uses stop reading into it

Anonymous 3d

idk i prefer it because to me pronouns are a linguistic tool i use to express my gender. especially when i was just questioning/figuring things out it felt easier to say im “using” xyz pronouns and then the switch to they/them became less daunting

Anonymous 4d

interesting point, hadn’t occurred to me before. like reflexively my thought was that everyone “uses” pronouns, but nah, in that specific situation it does sort of feel like they’re very covertly—usually unconsciously?—indicating that our pronouns are less, idk, innately accurate or “true”

Anonymous

#2 4d

real af

Anonymous

#4 4d

mostly because in my experience i only ever hear cis people phrase it that way, especially leaders of organizations in an attempt to make things “inclusive” but it comes off more as “i don’t completely understand or experience hardships from this and only recently started telling people my pronouns because i’ve never had people assume otherwise”. i feel like cis people often phrase it as a preference rather than an actual part of their identity.

Anonymous

#6 4d

bruh i only ever hear this shit from cis people

-4

Anonymous

OP 4d

i'm trans and i use the two verbs interchangeably really there is bigger things to be worried about idk what to tell you

Anonymous

#7 4d

like a more-subtle way of saying someone “identifies as” the gender they are

Anonymous

OP 3d

I’ve been using this phrase forever about everyone “my mom uses she/her” “I use she/her” “my friend uses they/them”. Idk I kinda thought like saying “using” is fine because our pronouns are just another small part of of our chosen identity(chosen in the sense that we have the power and right to identity ourselves as we want) I choose to use feminine clothing to express my gender identity more

Anonymous

#9 3d

and then obviously i’m not cis (?) but people, especially people in uncomfortable situations such as having to consider their gender for the first time, repeat the sentence structure those around them use

Anonymous

#8 3d

that makes sense. i guess cos i’ve been out for so long some parts of my identity don’t feel like a choice? like expression feels like a choice because i tend to be more fluid with it, but pronouns are very much tied to identity for me. i don’t choose or just use he/him pronouns, my pronouns just are he/him because i don’t want any flexibility regarding them. but i absolutely understand that is not the case for everyone.