Anonymous #2 11h

Great questions!!! For me the answers actually go together. The biggest ace myths in my opinion are that ace people cannot desire sex and they don’t get turned on. In reality, arousal and libido have nothing to do with sexual attraction. Arousal is simply a physical response to the suggestion of sexual action and people can desire sex for reasons other than sexual attraction. Asexuality is not about if you desire sex but who that desire is directed towards. (1)

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Anonymous roses4mylove 11h

If the answer is no one in particular, then you’re ace. I didn’t realize I was ace until college because I am one of those aces that likes the idea of sex. I realized when I tried it for myself and found that I didn’t experience sex like allo people do. It just always felt like there was something crucial missing to it. So I did some research, talked to an aroace friend, and reflected. (2)

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Anonymous roses4mylove 11h

My motives for having sex weren’t ever sexual attraction to their hand person I was with but people pleasing, arousal (it’s weird getting turned on by making out but also disliking it), it seemed expected, and I wanted to feel like Y/N in a smut fanfic. Thinking back on it, it probably should’ve clicked when I had to give a disclaimer before having sex every time after the first about how if I didn’t enjoy it, it was a me thing and not a them thing.

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Anonymous roses4mylove 11h

I also would like to add that ace people are all different. Some of us enjoy sex, some of us are indifferent, some are disgusted with it. At the end of the day, it’s a sexual orientation and those aren’t really about sex at all but who we feel drawn to have those experiences with. We’re all valid as ace.

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Anonymous roses4mylove 11h

Thank you this has been very helpful I appreciate it

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Anonymous #2 11h

Of course!!!!

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