
Genuinely so much of modern american traditionalism / conservatism comes from repressed sexual desire. They believe sex is only for a husband and wife to reproduce, so sexual desire, sex outside of marriage, sex for fun, kinks, etc are immoral. But, of course, they still have desire and kinks, so they have to find some way to justify it. For a lot of submissive women and dominant men, that gets generalized to ALL women are/ should be submissive, and ALL men are/ should be dominant.
When their desires that don’t line up with what they consider good or moral, they have to compensate somehow. Submissive or queer men will often get that in bed, and then act dominant or aggressive in other areas (at work, to their families, to minorities they don’t like, etc) to regain some masculinity. Similarly, dominant or queer women will often submit to their husbands, then act dominant or aggressive to people they think they’re above / have power over (their kids, min wage workers, etc).