Anonymous #1 2w

20

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Anonymous OP 2w

😭😭 how old are you ?? I expected you to say 9… why would a 20 year old adult be disrespectful to their sibling?

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Anonymous #1 2w

22

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Anonymous OP 2w

oh so your very close in age, that’s confusing I feel like y’all would be super close ?? if I had a sister that was 2 years apart we’d be besties. why do y’all have problems?

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Anonymous #1 2w

Okay so it’s a long story but basically my parents treat me like I’m adopted. Like okay my parents didn’t want me to get a job, I had to beg for it. Then i couldn’t drive, I had to beg to get a license. My father used to taunt me being like my sis would get one before me. When I finally got a license I wasn’t allowed to drive, my mom worked at the dmv and didn’t think I could drive. Now my sister doesn’t have a license yet and my parents bought a car for the both of us. They are more so acting

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Anonymous OP 2w

Like it’s her car and she’s so entitled on it for one, and two she is a back seat driver when I drive.

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Anonymous OP 2w

When we’re out in Public she nearly ignores me and has so much attitude. She’s a spoiled lil brat as well. She goes to school to a campus 3 min away from our house and lives on campus, but when I went, I was dropped off. She’s still on the bandwagon abt how my parents are lower middle class. My parents bought a 2020 car 2 years ago, the car that they just bought for us like a couple days ago was a 2019 model of the same car, my parents are upper middle class and she things they are lower

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Anonymous OP 2w

Mind you my parents pay for this girls school, yet when I got a job, my parents told me to pay my own tuition to a private school they forced me to go to.

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Anonymous OP 2w

I was working a minimum wage job and paid like 10k a semester

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Anonymous OP 2w

I got told to go to hell for spending my own money without asking, I borrowing 3k from my sister and my parents don’t know, my mother has access to both of our accounts. One of my aunts told me she feels like my mother treats me as if I’m adopted cuz my sister gets an entitled life and I don’t, I agree. All that and my sister acts like she runs the place.

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Anonymous OP 2w

She said she couldn’t come home for the weekend this week in her college 3 min away because she had an exam coming up. I’m taking classes online and I woke up late cuz I’m studying for a literal midterm and I was like yeah I was up until 5 am studying, my mom’s response to that was yeah right. Be so fr. My mom wakes up everyday at 5am and she literally saw me awake going downstairs to get food as she said, I was getting water, yet she thought I couldn’t possibly be studying

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Anonymous OP 2w

where do y’all live ? this seems like a problem coming from privilege 😭 bc I am so poor I have no car at 20 and I got fafsa for college. there’s so many worse things y’all could be fighting about. idk I would say to sit her down and ask to have a conversation about the car, just literally tell her that your frustrated with the way she’s acting about the car. you are both adults and she shouldn’t be acting any sort of way

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Anonymous OP 2w

why do you still live with your parents, can you not afford it? why didn’t you dorm? I mean I didn’t either so no judgement just wondering.

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Anonymous #1 2w

I also got the max fasfa, it just now got cut for my sister, like this year

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Anonymous OP 2w

My mom also got a big promotion

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Anonymous OP 2w

are these not like reasonable people you can just talk to? like are the immature? idk my family aren’t the type to have enough self awareness to change so there’s no point in trying to reason with them. but if you think your sister might listen to you if you like have a heart to heart with her idk

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Anonymous #1 2w

My parents would disown me if I didn’t live with them, in my culture girls don’t leave their house unless they are getting married. I didn’t dorm cuz my parents just didn’t allow me, then I went to a school out of state and my parents gave me so much shit abt it, they said I ruined their lives.

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Anonymous OP 2w

I went cuz my dad literally assaulted me, and my parents were financially abusive

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Anonymous #1 2w

I had a heart to heart with her today and I was like girl u don’t have a license so stop and she gave me so much attitude for it. She was like I know how to drive just because I don’t have a license doesn’t mean anything. Meanwhile this entire summer she wouldn’t drive the car we bought 2 years ago cuz it was the new car

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Anonymous OP 2w

I told her she could drive cuz I was scared to drive in the beginning of this summer being back home from college out of state for the past 2 years. I was scared to drive the new car cuz to me it was genuinely new and my parents hadn’t let me drive before, and she was like mm I don’t have a license so u should drive. Then she likes to tell me how to drive. Like this ain’t how it works

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Anonymous OP 2w

This was beginning of the summer, now I’m more used to it and okay with driving for the most part

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Anonymous OP 2w

it sounds like to me going away to college was a good thing, an abusive situation is never a good one, culture and family aside. why did you come back?

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Anonymous #1 2w

I graduated, I’m taking some time cuz I’m doing a post bacc and my mother is practically forcing me to come back home. She also wants me to go straight to med school, but I was depressed when I was home, so for the first 2 years of college I failed nearly all of my classes

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Anonymous OP 2w

maybe you should try saving some money? idk I mean you are literally the one with a license she isn’t. she could get points on her record if she gets pulled over which can prevent her from getting her license so it’s stupid that she’s even driving without one

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Anonymous OP 2w

My gpa needs me to do a post bacc, the worst part is my mother would never admit to the things that were going on

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Anonymous #1 2w

I had to basically get a 4 year degree in 2 when I transferred I spend a lot of my money on classes like summer classes, winter classes, and I doubled up during the semesters

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Anonymous OP 2w

I’m working and saving up, the car will help me now, hopefully. I’m still lowkey scared to use the car in our neighboring city. I also want to pay for my own masters, so I’ve applied to 190 scholarships so far. I’m trying to find a job that will pay decent cuz mine pays minimum wage and sucks cuz they cut hrs and tell me day of when I’m working, at least is working from home. Like I’m trying to get out of this situation but everything is just a mess

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Anonymous OP 2w

I’m trying to apply to jobs that I’d need to drive to cuz I wanna do lab work or phlebotomy, or a cna like I was 2 years ago when I lived at home. But no one hires anymore, it genuinely sucks.

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Anonymous OP 2w

I wish you the best, it sounds like you know what you want and honestly your the older sister and you have the license😭 take the keys and don’t let her have them when you need the car if nothing else works

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Anonymous #1 2w

She doesn’t drive by herself, she would never. The only issue is she acts like she can, then she has a permit so ofc if she wants to drive she can if I’m in the car with her so I say if she’s gonna be like that she can drive and she gets scared. Like such big talk for someone who literally doesn’t have a license

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Anonymous OP 2w

ohh okay, does she drive bad? why do you care if you are in the passenger seat or is it just because she’s being entitled sbout it

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Anonymous #1 2w

She comments on my driving and says I’m being too slow when I’m literally driving the speed limit and we just got this car 4 days ago and everyone including my parents want to act like it’s mostly her car and since she doesn’t have a license I have access to it so my parents don’t seem like bad parents in terms of fairness. I want to buy my own car and I will when I have the money cuz I don’t trust that this car will be mine at all even partially. I know when my sister gets a license it’s hers

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Anonymous OP 2w

that sucks that your parents aren’t treating you the same, why would they buy a car for just one child and say fuck the other one? or at least act like it’s an equal split if they expect you both to live at home with them… it’s not like she’s 16 and your 25

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Anonymous OP 2w

She wants to talk big but then when I tell her to drive she’s like no I don’t have a license and it’s a new car, like be so fr. She hasn’t driven with me for like 2 years. I was home 2 years ago and we had an older car that is now sold and she drove that one on the way to a place and told me to drive back home

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Anonymous #1 2w

It’s cuz of the fact that I want to go away next semester for my masters out of state. My mom already told me this car is staying home, which is fine cuz I didn’t pay for it my mom did, so yeah I shouldn’t have a say, but then by that time my sister will have a license and get a car right away when I had to wait like 2-3 years that’s wild

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Anonymous OP 2w

And I’m further away from home and I can’t have a car, yet the daughter living 3 min away on a college campus with roommates that have cars can have a car

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Anonymous OP 2w

while I do agree with you, I think you should take a step back and look at it from a different perspective. i’m 19 almost 20 and my mom has a shit car could never afford to buy me a car and i’ve taken out a loan from my school so I can afford to buy a car to be able to get to my job. the fact that your parents are able to buy y’all cars at all let alone 2 and ur 22. I understand you live at home but you are relying on the fact that your parents are able to give u a car

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Anonymous OP 2w

if you didn’t have that to fall back on, at 22 you’d have saved up to get enough to have your own. they clearly won’t ever fully give you a car so I feel like that’s the only option

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Anonymous #1 2w

I see that, at the same time when I started college I was told by my parents forced not to work because they said they would cover everything. They said that I didn’t need anything they didn’t provide, and for that I’m thankful. Except I wanted a car then and begged for one since, because my father would assault me in the car and make me late to things. So I begged to get a job a minimum wage job as a cna, and I was only allowed cuz a friend of mine worked there. Only then I got $30,000 working

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Anonymous OP 2w

A little over a year and spent that entirety on classes and my college tuition for 2 semesters. Meanwhile my sister is yeah taking out a loan for college, but my parents are paying that loan off for her. And she gets a car. What I experienced was financial abuse. Paying for a class with my own money and getting told I’d go to hell. Then my mother would randomly take $1000 from my account for no reason and not tell me why

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Anonymous OP 2w

do you know you can get good second hand cars for 4000-6000? 30,000 dollars is a lot of money. also I understand that, I don’t have any culture or family that would prevent me from working or anything like that. but now that you do work I think that should be the goal for now so you can get out of that situation

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Anonymous OP 2w

I now know that she has money. I mean my dad is domestically violent and I’ve told me my since I was 10 to leave him but she won’t. He financially abuses her. But she likes to keep money in my shared account with her and over take the money when she uses it, that’s why I got 1k taken out. I get her situation and I feel bad but I as the child should not be a middle man or front

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Anonymous OP 2w

that’s horrible, your parents shouldn’t have access to your accounts. I mean you can even get a cash app and get your direct deposits from work on there..

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Anonymous #1 2w

I had an account that was specific to my state, I wasn’t allowed to open another bank account without parental access until this month and even then when I went to college out of state I had no access to my own account like if I needed cash. My mother deadass told me to use my credit card for everything and pay it off with my bank that I couldn’t access

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Anonymous OP 2w

It was all my money yet I had no control over it, taking the extra classes was so difficult to hide from my mother and she would get mad with money “missing”

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Anonymous OP 2w

ok real talk you say not allowed you are a grown ass adult. you don’t have to legally do anything your parents say. I get you live with them but if you had 30,000$ you could’ve moved out easily

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Anonymous #1 2w

I didn’t have 30k sitting

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Anonymous OP 2w

It was 10k a semester for school, I had to pay all I had and my parents wouldn’t tell me before hand ur paying ur tuition they would say so ur tuition is due in a week u pay, when they had already promised me they’d pay all 4 years

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Anonymous OP 2w

okay well yws what they did was really fucked up and I wouldn’t forgive them, but at this point you need to stop making excuses and start making the efforts to take control over your own life. get your own accounts, save money secretly, get a car and get our of there

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Anonymous OP 2w

So each semester for 2 semesters, I had 10k and it was gone by the time school started

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Anonymous OP 2w

Then the other 10k was what u got the summer before I went out of state

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Anonymous OP 2w

That was used for classes

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Anonymous OP 2w

But yeah I’m working on moving out, like I said I applied to 190 scholarships, made a spreadsheet and everything I’m still applying. I also work a job, and now that I have a car I’m going to try to get another one a better one. It’s just a lot

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