Anonymous #1 4w

I just feel badly because I don’t date based on looks, I like being friends with someone first. I’ll be honest and say that looks play a part in my attraction to someone, idk, like I was friends with my first relationship for about a year platonically before we started dating, and then he ended up cheating on me anyways so maybe I just really need to work on my judgement? Idk, just feeling demoralized af rn 🥀

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Anonymous #1 4w

Okay so first off, your friends are horribly incorrect about that. I dated my last ex bc I thought he was “too ugly to cheat”, and was proven wrong. After him, I just started going for people I was genuinely attracted to, and met my (now) fiancé. He’s both the most attractive and sweetest person I’ve ever met. Looks don’t really change the content of someone’s character. I also hate that they’re blaming you for men’s shortcomings

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Anonymous #1 4w

Thank you, idk, my few male friends say I need to lower my standards, my female friends say I need to absolutely not do that, but the hard part is that I feel like after all this time I’m not as attractive as the “type” of guy I like. Idk, I think I’ve just lost a lot of confidence over a few years because of some shitty guys haha but it does make me feel better that they’re wrong (also congrats on your fiancé hehe!!)

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Anonymous OP 4w

Trust me babe, been there!! Just try to keep your head up. After being cheated on so many times by so many dudes, I decided to just shoot for the stars and aim “out of my league”. My fiancé genuinely thinks *I* am out of his league 😭 you just need to find a guy who wasn’t always attractive, they’re forced to form personalities and to learn to be nice to people. People who have always been hot and popular just don’t get it.

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Anonymous #1 4w

And absolutely do NOT lower your standards. It’s better to be single and taken care of than in a relationship and hating your life.

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Anonymous #1 4w

bro ok ok ok yes totally agree with you about finding someone who didn’t grow up hot bc I get it as someone who didn’t grow up hot but I became friends with a mutual friend who was like that and he chose a situationship who lived in Australia over me 😅 he admitted he was an asshole for leading me on and he lwk fucked up everything w my friends bc he was like objectively in the wrong 😭 But I’ll try again I believe 🙏

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Anonymous OP 4w

My fiancé calls himself a “former fat kid” who was forced to develop a personality. I was also heavily bullied middle-high school between having acne and AuDHD. We both had MAJOR glow ups in college so it’s like a perfect match. You just have to find someone with a background like that lol

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Anonymous #1 4w

my ex was a “former fat kid” and super shy and not very popular. he had definitely had a glow up when i met him, was still just as insecure and had a terrible personality, just looked better physically. i don’t think there’s a certain look or a certain type. it’s just the right person when u know it’s the right person if that makes sense.

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Anonymous #2 4w

Oh for sure, that’s just his own reasoning for it. You’re definitely right though

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