Girl Talk on Sidechat | hot take: hookup culture shouldn’t be as normalized as it is, especially cause it’s at the point where women get shamed if they don’t do hookups

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Girl Talk 2w

hot take: hookup culture shouldn’t be as normalized as it is, especially cause it’s at the point where women get shamed if they don’t do hookups

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Anonymous 2w

I’m so sorry but I’ve never heard of a woman getting shamed for not.. like engaging in safe casual sex.. shamed all the time

Anonymous 2w

op people are hating but i agree… i literally get hated on every time i talk about not being active/having relationships?? women are hated if they do have sex and hated if they don’t. it’s misogyny at work :(

Anonymous 2w

if you have casual sex, they call you a slut. if you just want to date with no sex, you’re a prude. if you do a little of both, you’re a mess and don’t know what you want. like we can’t win.

Anonymous 2w

i feel bad for straight women you guys get shamed if you do and shamed if you don’t

Anonymous 2w

women are also heavily shamed if we do hook up too… but the first part i agree with

Anonymous 2w

Women get shamed for hooking up also though. Like I guess in traditional in a sense that I’m dating for marriage. So there’s a guy I’m interested in but we’re not gonna actually date until we’re ready to get married. So we’re best friends for now and I like it that way

Anonymous 2w

Unpopular opinion… I feel like us women should say no more to hookups if we don’t a 100 percent want to purely just hookup. There is so many broken hearts from dumb situationships when we women need to put our foot down and demand what we want from the start. Men feel entitled to sex cause we say yes to whatever they want. Which leads to ambigousy, messy, and heartbroken filled situationships with risk of pregnancy and STDs. And on top of that no real relationship and embarrassment!

Anonymous 2w

Honestly? Im a virgin and I socialize with a lot of people. Sometimes I feel embarrassed when talking about it, but I realize that it’s not OTHERS shaming me. They’re my own feelings. I see women shamed no matter what they do. That’s the nature of being a woman in this society.

Anonymous

#2 2w

no fr these ran thru men be wanting pure modest dressing virgin mary’s…

Anonymous

#2 2w

well i have, i’ve been shamed for it before. a lot of it comes from other women too which is hurtful

Anonymous

#1 2w

This was a whole discourse on my school page today😭 women’s “purity” tbh I’m happy we have sexual freedom and in comparison to the generations before us we’re hooking up way less. Like ppl should have the choice to hookup or not hookup. Should it be encouraged no, but normal yes

Anonymous

#2 2w

As someone who was treated like crap when talking to guys in my freshman year of college because I was waiting for marriage. They hate when you do and don’t put out. I also got called prudish because I wouldn’t hold hands with a guy on a first date that I barely knew. And my friends in my circle at the time told me to get over myself and just lose my virginity and stop holding onto fairytales because I was asking too much for a guy to wait for me.

Anonymous

OP 2w

as a woman i’m pro do whatever the hell we want because we’ll get shamed either way it’s the unfortunate reality but i’m only anti hookup culture because men get praised for it (undeservingly) and women get slut shamed so i believe men don’t deserve shit

Anonymous

#2 2w

EWWWWW any man that’s into “purity” traits in a woman wants a fucking child

Anonymous

OP 2w

Im sorry that happens to you, girls can be bitches. You will find the right people that that understand you. it is a negative that has to come along with all the other ones for being allowed to have sex whenever and a slight ounce of bodily autonomy lol. I wouldn’t want to live in a time where you get sentenced for doing it or completely cut off from ur family/society

Anonymous

#1 2w

Right, we’re damned if we do damned if we don’t all the time bro

Anonymous

#1 2w

Me too! I also noticed that early on. Even tho I’m waiting idc what other ppl do. But I did immediately think; us getting all freaky isn’t sticking it to the man like we thought. Because men would love to have endless one night stands and refuse to have a relationship ties. And then they get to weaponize the movement against us to either reinforce purity or shame those who don’t want to participate

Anonymous

#5 2w

Exactly. Just focus on yourself and when a good man comes along wife him up

Anonymous

#2 2w

In my experience it goes both ways. Literally women can’t win either way. Women get shamed for having sex, and for not having it. I already know my friends have been shamed for hooking up with people. I’ve also been shamed and called a prude or uptight etc bc I don’t personally participate in hookup culture.

Anonymous

#5 2w

I’m an ace lady, (asexual). I’ve gotten comments from gentlemen giving me a hard time here and there, yes. But I’m sad to say I’ve seen WAY more shaming of ladies who engage in hookup culture. Heck, sometimes in praising me, gentlemen have put down women who do have sex. I’m always confused on how on earth they’d think shaming women would get them points with me. :(

Anonymous

#9 2w

Aw I’m sorry 5, didn’t mean to say anything wrong! Just added my perspective, but maybe it’s supposed to be more one-sided and I misread. 🥲

Anonymous

#9 2w

I do wonder what I said wrong exactly in the first message - I mostly wonder so I don’t mess up again later. I suspect it’s my fault for mentioning I’m ace. I’ve had a lot of folks not respond to happiest upon hearing that. 😭 Sorry for being a yapper. XD Just recovering from surgery.

Anonymous

#2 2w

I had someone shame me for it recently and told me I'm either lying or a nun... She was weird with a boyfriend and 3 side pieces (one being married)

Anonymous

#7 2w

Us gay women also get shamed if you do and shamed if you don’t. You’re ‘ruined’ if a man touches you, but ‘broken’ if you don’t want a man. They always find problems with women. Thats the nature of patriarchal society.

Anonymous

#12 2w

True, but I also don’t interact with men or annoying gold star people.

Anonymous

#7 2w

Actually I interact with a few men but only decent people.

Anonymous

#7 2w

haha, same. I’m in a law and poli sci program so i have to interact with a lot of bad men. It’s also a very privileged school so it makes it worse. But im only friends with like… 3 cis men

Anonymous

#12 2w

I am also polisci and take classes in rich schools but I take woke classes that annoying people wouldn’t take in the first place

Anonymous

#7 2w

My school mandates a lot of ‘woke’ classes so i unfortunately have to deal with them anyway

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