Girl Talk on Sidechat | i want to become more confrontational and not tolerate people giving each other a look or making a snyde comment if i say something they think is weird or they just dislike me for no reason. how do i start ? what do i even say ?

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Girl Talk 11w

i want to become more confrontational and not tolerate people giving each other a look or making a snyde comment if i say something they think is weird or they just dislike me for no reason. how do i start ? what do i even say ?

Anonymous 11w

Lowkey, I would prolly read self help book abt it tbh— but as someone who doesn’t mind a little confrontation, I think the most important thing is to know urself well enough to understand why certain things bug you so u can pick ur battles wisely.

Anonymous 11w

Also I realized u asked what to say— I find that a lot of times when ppl are making snide comments or exchanging weird looks a rlly good way to call them out is just to point out that they’re being weird by asking them a question that forces them to explain the behavior, which u could do in two ways:

Anonymous

#1 11w

Like— if someone does something and it bothers me, but I know it’s not rlly that important to me, or I’m just upset bc of my own personal triggers and it’s not rlly bc they’ve done anything so terrible, I will only being it up if it continues on a lot and the relationship is really important to me, otherwise I’ll just let it go and/or distance myself from the person since I don’t rlly fw them and move on with my life

Anonymous

#1 11w

BUT if someone does something that rlly goes against what’s important to me and the things that I value, then I will often decide to confront them about it (for example I really think that being kind and considerate is rlly important so if someone is rlly rude to me or someone else I’ll often times sort of call them out for being rude) and I find that if u know what’s important to you and why it’s important to you it’s much easier to speak up about it and confront others when necessary

Anonymous

#1 11w

1- you could play dumb and ask questions as if u genuinely don’t realize they’re being mean to you until they get uncomfortable (works best if they aren’t that bold) Or 2- you don’t play dumb and instead ask the same or similar questions but in a more confrontational way ( I think it works bc it lets them know that if they are rude to u they’re gonna have to explain themselves which is why it works rlly well on ppl who are mean rlly just for the sake of being mean)

Anonymous

#1 11w

The reason asking questions works so well is bc if you just tell them they’re rude and ur mad mean ppl dont rlly care abt ur feelings so they wont listen and instead theyll tell u ur crazy or sensitive and itll be up to you to prove that they’re the mean ones, at which point ur already left feeling even more belittled and then you’ve lost— so you gotta start out with questions so that the conversation starts out with them having to explain themselves and not the other way around