Anonymous #2 4w

Oof I’m sorry. Stalking is very scary.

1

Anonymous #1 4w

I agree! The staring is very off putting.

5

Anonymous OP 4w

I even started considering moving apartments cause one of the guys approached MY MOM who was leaving talking about some "are u -my name-?" 💀🙏

1

Anonymous #4 4w

And then the most recent time was not being asked for anything but last week at a bar I was w my sister and two guys sitting a seat down from us asked what we were drinking and offered to drink with us, I said aw no thank you but you should try them! we were leaving anyways (the drink was very yum I hope they tried it)

3

Anonymous #3 4w

I’m sure you’re beautiful. I think social media has got us a little bit more timid to interact with each other.

6

Anonymous OP 4w

That’s definitely true, but since I never get the experience of being asked out or even catcalled/harassed irl it’s just a reminder that I’m not what people consider “attractive” :/

1

Anonymous #4 4w

Not he was ugly omg 😭😭

1

Anonymous #5 4w

That’s so sick he was trying to use you for a ride wtf?! What a bum.

5

Anonymous #6 4w

So you got approached more because you were blonde? Is that what you’re thinking?

1

Anonymous OP 4w

I’m not sure but it has been a constant thing where when I have blonde hair I get approached more

1

Anonymous OP 4w

Yes girl😵‍💫😭

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Anonymous #3 4w

I don’t think it’s that you’re not attractive. Certain features are definitely considered “more inviting” than others which is completely false and weird. Take me. I’m black so people assume that I am rude and mean unless I’m smiling and bouncing off of the walls 24/7. Been like that my whole life.

1

Anonymous #6 4w

That’s really interesting to hear. I love yalls perspectives.

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Anonymous OP 4w

I’m black too😭 I attend a HBCU only go to class and school so maybe that’s why I’m rarely approached

1

Anonymous #5 4w

Same I’m mixed

1

Anonymous OP 4w

I find it really interesting how people’s styles can affect how much they are approached by people too. I’ve had a gothic, ytk, grunge, emo, clean girl, and hippy style before and all have had differing amounts people would approach me. I’d get approached most when I had a more clean girl or gothic style then rn with my more hippy/grunge style

1

Anonymous #5 4w

See I attend a PWI and I’m also quiet and reserved. I don’t get approached much either unless it’s through social media. It doesn’t bother me much but i think ppl assume women get approached a lot more than we actually do. Of course that doesn’t apply to everyone since other factors matter (race, personality, setting)

3

Anonymous OP 4w

Exactly. I think other races are approached more often

1

Anonymous #6 4w

Same. I’m definitely more of a dark feminine and I’ve only gotten approached if I am wearing athleisure wear or if I am out at bars. And that was still rare. Now that I wear a lot more dark clothes, crickets.

4

Anonymous #5 4w

Oh for sure and no doubt about it. I am also not what a lot of men my race deem attractive ( I am thin and don’t have the “baddie” aesthetic) so i dont get approached by black men at all actually. The few times they were, they were mixed or athletes and played tf out of my ass too 🥴.

7

Anonymous OP 4w

I never get approached girl. I wear braids (no makeup or wigs) and I have glasses and acne😂 I considered myself to be slime I’m not skinny. But I workout 5x a week and eat healthy

1

Anonymous #5 4w

slim*

1

Anonymous #5 4w

slime?? girl u a frog? 🤨

0

Anonymous #2 4w

I meant slim, did you not see I corrected that?? 🥲

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Anonymous #5 4w

Sometimes it’s an environment thing unfortunately. It’s dry here but it would be a drought if I took my ass to an HBCU fs! My hg who is thick, and has more of an insta baddie aesthetic gets approached every time we go out. And I mean every time. But when I got out with her, we’re only around “our” people, who don’t like me 😂😂 my other friend is skinny also and doesn’t get approached either.

1

Anonymous OP 4w

Could it be how she wear her hair? I hear men like wigs and makeup?

1

Anonymous OP 4w

It really depends on location. I live in a smaller town rn, but whenever I travel outside of my city guys talk to me.

1

Anonymous #5 4w

She def wears wigs and makeup. I don’t care for wigs but I wear makeup also. It’s def a body type and style (she has great style honestly) thing. And she’s stunning of course! I heard the whole hair theory thing. Do you think it’s real?

5

Anonymous OP 4w

Honestly idk. I had an older guy said I look good with my natural hair

1

Anonymous #5 4w

But I’m not changing my style to get approached. If guys aren’t attracted to me so be it

4

Anonymous #1 4w

I unfortunately don’t travel much and I also go to college in a small town. I do plan on going to grad school after this year. Idk where but I wonder if things will change when I do 😂😂

1

Anonymous #5 4w

Oh I definitely agree. Will not be changing anything about myself to be palatable for anyone. Wouldn’t be living in my truth if I did that. It’s humid where I live so I don’t get to wear my natural hair much. My styles don’t last and I’m lazy.

4

Anonymous OP 4w

What exactly is the aesthetic ? 😭😭 revealing clothing , makeup & wigs? Like I’m so confused

1

Anonymous #5 4w

What, that men find attractive or my friends? Or me?

1

Anonymous #7 4w

I get this. The first time someone made a comment to me was at a gas station by an old man that knew me and my mom well when I was 15. Probably was 95lbs soaking wet and wore childish clothes. I was pretty rude as a teenager so it didn’t take much to set me off and I scared him off.

1