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Why are so many guys allergic to having a personality? Stop trying to be so nonchalant about everything in your life, it’s so boring 🫠
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Anonymous 6d

Like seriously you guys need to unlearn some toxic masculinity it’s ok to be happy about things and feel things and have fun doing things. It’s ok to have passions outside of drugs and watching sports

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Anonymous 6d

Because if we show we care it’s game over. We have to balance not caring and caring and have to keep your interest when you have literally hundreds of options

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

I don’t have hundreds of options, everyone I meet is either too different or too nonchalant or both. I can’t date someone who makes me feel like I’m talking to a brick wall, and nobody is forcing men to act that way

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

Even if you say you don’t you actually do. You can go on any dating app and get a guy in five seconds. Then the question is do you know how to keep a conversation? Cause most girls I talk to have the conversation skills of a door. Yes no one is forcing guys to act that except if we want to have even a slight chance we have to do that

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

I know how to keep a conversation, it’s the guys that don’t. Hence why I made the post. I don’t have hundreds of options when the options are the equivalent of speaking to my dog

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

So I’m saying you do have options you are saying you don’t have quality options

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

Yes, that’s what this entire post is about

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

Well it’s a classic quality over quantity haha women have the quantity and men have neither haha

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

My favorite analogy: men are thirsty in a desert, women are thirsty in a contaminated swamp

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

wait so you’re willing to hide your entire personality just to be with her for the foreseeable future? respectfully i don’t understand how that won’t make you unhappy eventually

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 6d

I’m not saying to hide your personality! I’m saying you have to balance being invested in someone and not at the same time

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

You don’t have to be a nonchalant shell of a person to not be clingy and overbearing

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

Ehhh haha

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

If you can’t find a healthy balance between being avoidant and being obsessive, that’s your problem, not women’s

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

The balance is dependent how the woman reacts haha. Women get the ick for stupid reasons haha

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

So do men. It’s almost like everyone’s their own person so it’s best to be an actual person and find someone who wants you the way you are… unless suppressing your personality and passions for the rest of your life just to get the attention of a woman who doesn’t love you for real is what you prefer

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

Do men get an ick from a girl giving the wrong look? Do they for when a girl wears a type of shoes they don’t like? I can go on haha

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

Yeah, a lot of men do get the ick from women wearing, saying, or doing harmless things they find annoying or unsexy. This isn’t even the point of the post, it’s starting to seem like you just took personal offense to my complaint and want to take it out on women

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

Anyways! So many guys these days are too caught up in their own self image that they turn themselves into a brick wall. It’s important to fight against toxic masculinity because I’m trying to be with someone who isn’t afraid of having hobbies and a full personality like me

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

Yeah so do women haha both are self centered! Curious what’s considered toxic masculinity to you?

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

You can Google it to get more examples

post
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

Yeah and I said to you. Not a Google search. Also men do typically need to suppress their emotions. We are told to

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

My definition is the same as the actual definition, which is what I just showed you. That is my answer too. You don’t need to suppress your emotions, but you’re too absorbed in toxic masculinity to realize that

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

I could very easily say I HAVE to shave my body hair, constantly wear makeup in public and in my photos, be submissive in relationships, etc because those are things that are expected of women in our current society ruled by gender roles. But in reality I don’t have to do those things. Some people hate me for it, but I’m myself.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 6d

You’re assuming I have a lot of toxic masculinity haha I actually am typically seen as a feminine energy man or a “beta” Also women typically say once they see a man cry all the attraction is gone

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 6d

Yes you are a victim of toxic masculinity. And you are perpetuating it too. Nobody is forcing you to restrict yourself to a specific set of unhealthy gender roles, as I’ve already explained to you

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 5d

How am I a victim haha very curious to hear this

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 5d

Because you fully believe that you “have” to suppress your emotions and personality to be with women, which isn’t true

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 5d

Not personality just most sad emotions haha

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 5d

Yeah, and you don’t actually have to. Toxic masculinity is the belief that men should do that, and it’s perpetuated by both men and women

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 5d

What if we observe that when we show emotions that the woman looses all attraction and even says it?

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 5d

oops i missed a lot. aa yeah i get wanting to be invested in someone but i think it’s healthier to present the best version of yourself, like, eg to present myself as someone who’s considerate or confident etc because i’d want to improve in that way.

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 5d

isn’t that also weeding out the people that are just not compatible with you, maturity wise? i think most of the loss of no longer adhering to toxic masculinity is that people that only care about you in terms of how well you fit stereotypes leave. idk lol like cool only people who actually give a shit about me remain and also… do you value not being single more than you want to find a woman that likes you authentically?

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 5d

She is also perpetuating toxic masculinity, and not someone you should want to spend the rest of your time with. I seriously don’t understand why you’d want to be with someone who expects you to be someone else and act a certain way the rest of your life instead of spending more time to find someone who actually loves you, values your emotions, and isn’t sexist

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 5d

What if it’s an overwhelming experience of men?

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 5d

An overwhelming experience of women is being told by society and men that they need to be thin, hairless, uneducated, dress and act a certain way, but they don’t actually have to. Men don’t have to follow sexist gender roles either. Sure you might have fewer dating options, just as the women who don’t conform to misogynistic standards are less desirable by men, but would you rather be with someone who is only with you because they’re treating you like an actor playing a role for them?

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 5d

I’m getting tired of repeating myself over and over to you. Either you want things to get better or you don’t. If you want to completely change who you are and be miserable bottling up your emotions (often leading to outbursts and violence against romantic partners by the way!) that’s your choice I guess

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 5d

It’s interesting how you continue to say it’s society or men perpetuating this. Never women that perpetuate it or are part of the problem

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 5d

My mistake, yes women can absolutely pressure other women into conforming to gender roles Everything else I’ve said still stands

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 5d

Ok just making sure haha some women can’t even admit when they are part of the problem

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