
i don't think the nice behavior is the main cause, the being nice to them is why they keep you as a friend instead of dropping the relationship but the main thing is them just not reciprocating your feelings and attraction i guess. anyways regardless i don't know how i feel about guys who would withhold kindness because they don't want to end up friendzoned
I don’t think it has to do with reciprocation of attraction. Guys like this don’t make moves unless the are sure it will work, if they’re using it as a tactic to get a relationship. I am telling you that being nice, genuinely listening to a girl and being there, that is not how you build attraction.
i mean that's clearly not true for me though. i understand if you're suggesting that that's true for the girls who friendzone guys like this but for me that is how i become attracted and attached to a guy, a face does nothing for me if he's not like that when we interact personally, like human to human. idk i guess i get moderating your behavior to attain a certain thing but the way guys have treated me and talked to me is why i say i wouldn't like a guy who only acts like this for a date
Yeah that makes sense. I think what you’re saying si that if you catch on that he just being performative, then of course it’s not attractive. The other important thing I want to note about everything that I’m saying is that when you are in the relationship, I think you HAVE to act like “the ai” and be a good person. I guess we men are programmed to do the mating ritual before we can start acting like real humans, and if we act like real human before, many women think it’s perfomative?