Anonymous #4 11w

not being a virgin = ran through??

44

Anonymous #10 11w

Why do you care?

9

Anonymous #9 11w

cause it was my own partner who told me. i had no problem with being celibate but to make a comment that it’s disrespectful when you’re aware im not a virgin is j rude

47

Anonymous #4 11w

It’s fine to have that standard if you hold yourself to it as well. I’m a woman waiting for marriage and want my future husband to be a virgin. But if I had slept with people that would be an unreasonable expectation on my end—it becomes not a value anymore but a demand

31

Anonymous #4 11w

it’s understandable to want a woman who isn’t “ran through” or in your opinion has self respect. but you can’t hold the woman to that standard if you can’t practice what you preach

18

Anonymous #16 11w

Woman**

4

Anonymous #18 11w

Exactly and it’s literally a preference. You can’t hate on someone because they prefer someone with less bodies. Everyone isn’t required to accept a high body count

8

Anonymous #18 11w

Of course there are woman who want their men to be virgins, but i believe the person who posted this is looking at the majority of who is targeted the most for not being a virgin; woman. it’s okay to have a preference but it isn’t okay to respond to someone and degrade them when you can’t even hold yourself to that standard

30

Anonymous #19 11w

i’m sure the same thing could be said about the men

23

Anonymous #18 11w

That stance is inherently slut shaming and it would never be the other way around except for in a few instances because men are not systematically slut shamed the way women are. Additionally, women do not have the same taste (wanting younger looking partners) even lesbians prefer older looking women to women rhat look significantly younger than them

44

Anonymous OP 11w

Virginity is a social construct and you can break that skin literally riding a bike

40

Anonymous #15 11w

A male has external parts a female does not

-7

Anonymous #23 11w

🤣

-6

Anonymous #24 11w

And that’s perfectly fine

48

Anonymous #14 11w

the problem is not practicing what you preach, not infantilization. I mean infantilization totally is a problem but this particular value issue is a hypocrisy problem. Different issue.

13

why do you say that :c

12

Not necessarily

39

🫠

12

That depends on how you define pleasant, for one, and it really is okay for people to have a different value than you 😭

23

If you educate yourself then no it won’t 😭 you can be a virgin who knows about sex without having it

31

Anonymous #15 11w

But I don’t see where stating “I want my wife to be a virgin” or “I want my husband to be a virgin” is degrading. If feels like people are making assumptions based off of insecurities or something else because if the sentence continued with slurs disgust me it’s not targeting women or men in a demeaning way. Let’s not assume everyone has ill intent in this matter and see it from a big picture perspective. Not everyone has malice in their heart

6

Anonymous #16 11w

right

8

Anonymous OP 11w

jesus christ some of you guys in these comments need to take a walk in the fresh air

25

Anonymous #23 11w

Aww so sweet that you want your wife to have so much in common with you!

56

Exactly. The standard for women is quiet, hairless, submissive, virgins. Which feels very much like looking for a young girl

90

Anonymous #16 11w

A and b conversation buddy C your way out of here my son

-9

Anonymous #19 11w

so with that reasoning, because a male has external parts it’s okay for him to get with as many females as he pleases but a woman will be shamed if she were to do the same because her parts aren’t “external”?

31

Anonymous #18 11w

Because seeing sex between two consenting adults as a bad thing is regressive and if you make a personal choice thats one thing but to look down on people who are not virgins or immediately write them off regardless of the personality is degrading especially when it happens disproportionately to women

20

Anonymous #15 11w

Yeah

-7

Anonymous #26 11w

😭😭😭😭

5

Anonymous OP 11w

BOOOOOOOOOOO

-6

Anonymous OP 11w

Or just don’t sleep around

-9

Anonymous #15 11w

It’s not about shame it’s about the effect it has, a vagina isn’t gonna stay the after 5-10 bodies like a dick will plain and simple argue it all u want lol

3

Anonymous #11 11w

Stay the same *

3

Anonymous #14 11w

I want her to be homosexual like me too

6

Anonymous #16 11w

Its a part of a larger systematic preference for younger looking, skinny, hairless, submissive women

72

Anonymous #11 11w

so the vagina is a muscle.. it does not infact get stretched the way your butthole would when you and your friends peg each other lol

35

Anonymous OP 11w

I would say look at my comment to 15. You’re making an assumption that someone who says that has malice intent. The only way that double standards continue to exist is if you accept them. I don’t and we all should hold each other to the same standards. A man that sleeps around is a slut too and we all know it. You are speaking on a specific type of man which is not all men same as not all women who has more than 1–2 bodies is a slut. Some people want intimacy with one person that’s okay

12

Anonymous #11 11w

Okay but other than morals and sleeping around, which I completely agree with, there is no difference PHYSICALLY than a woman sleeping with 10 different men or 1 man 10 different times

22

Anonymous #21 11w

Thats fine but saying you wont even consider someone who has had sec even once is different then “i know this person is not looking for the same thing as me and we are not compatible”

16

Anonymous #15 11w

It’s not gonna be the same bro argue it all u want

0

Anonymous OP 11w

Yeah agreed fa

18

Anonymous #22 11w

Not having sex doesnt make u better than anyone btw!

35

Anonymous OP 11w

Especially if it was with a long term partner that just happened to not work out

22

Anonymous #18 11w

you’re 100% correct that different people have different intents. but the majority of men hear “you’re not a virgin? you’ve been ran through” which follows with degrading slurs, and MOST (not all) of the men saying this have similar if not higher body counts than the woman they’re degrading. but logistically this primarily happens to woman and not the other way around

30

Anonymous #11 11w

And that’s before bringing up whether or not the guy pulls out

-5

Anonymous OP 11w

Just because someone has a preference does not mean they hate women who sleep around. My favorite color is pink but I don’t hate all colors and refuse to wear they. Again making an assumption off of a sentence

-2

Anonymous OP 11w

Who said better? But why are you judging somebody else for principals that they have?

-7

Anonymous #15 11w

What would you consider ran through

2

Anonymous #7 11w

did not mean to reply to OP when i said this*

39

So you’re saying it’s gonna last at least 8 minutes longer than the majority of your encounters? Ok….

24

Anonymous #14 11w

I agree but i think that some of the examples you use are exceptions that doesnt necessarily reflect my point. People do have more sex as they get older, that is just basic reason based on college, marraige, going to bars, etc. my point is that is that wanting a virgin falls into thw same catagory to me as wanting hairless, skinny, obeident wife who will do anythong to stay looking young

25

Anonymous #23 11w

Literally what is wrong with u

23

Okay and they’ll have the rest of their life’s to practice. They don’t need to practice with other people first to get it that’s such a weird and odd thing to say. Are you seeing the people who you are in a relationship with as someone just to practice sex with until the right person?

22

Anonymous #24 11w

And see thats fine and normal because you are both being held to the same standard

17

Anonymous #16 11w

i feel like the better question is what do men consider ran through because most women don’t use that term. from most experiences a man hears their friend had sex with a woman and automatically the friend group calls her ran through

23

Anonymous #19 11w

And?

5

Anonymous #18 11w

Okay i didnt say if both people want to save themselves for marriage i said men who specifically get their rocks off to virgins

26

Anonymous #2 11w

Higher standard literally means better 🧍‍♀️

36

Anonymous #19 11w

Yeah but you’re spreading misinformation. Can’t let you do that lil bud

11

Anonymous #19 11w

Thats literally not true. Women are popping out babies and u really think ur 🍤 is gonna make a difference

25

Anonymous #19 11w

In a comment section buddy you know better than that it’s a A-Z conversation. You should have Dmed them that if you didn’t want criticism

14

Anonymous #15 11w

From my perspective I think age def matters. I wouldn’t call a woman ran through after 1 body. Now when you get to 5-6+ that’s where it gets crazy to me but also the age matters too

-5

Anonymous #19 11w

WHO CARES THE PUSS IS SELF CLEANING

5

Anonymous OP 11w

Jesus yall need a basic biology lesson

13

Anonymous OP 11w

Yeah but that’s different it’s supposed to push out babies however it’s not supposed to be dick central taking any and all customers

-8

Anonymous OP 11w

Tell that to miss stinkpuss I had to ditch last month

-8

Anonymous OP 11w

also let’s just discuss the fact that the vagina is a MUSCLE. whether or not the guy pulls out before a woman becomes pregnant, the vagina retracts to the same size it was before insertion. the vagina before and after sex would feel the same because it’s a MUSCLE. it doesn’t just continue to get bigger. like u said these men need a bio lesson 🤦🏻‍♀️

31

Anonymous #11 11w

Also if u knew basic biology youd know women also have outer hardward and that is often the only way women can cum. Sex is always going yo be more than just penetration

25

Anonymous #16 11w

Why don’t you want her to have any experience prior to being with you? Why do you think being touched by other men degrades her? She’s a person

61

Anonymous #16 11w

and both of those are 100% fair reasons in the partner you choose. the problem that most woman are getting at is the hypocrisy. men are stereotypically praised for getting with as many females as possible, but if a woman were to do that she is slut shamed. it’s okay to have personal standards, what isn’t okay is to shame someone who doesn’t or not hold yourself to the same standards your preaching

13

Anonymous #11 11w

Stis are different but the idea of being “stretches out” is tired and misogynistic

26

Anonymous OP 11w

*stretched

11

Anonymous OP 11w

Then you should have specified that in your post which you didn’t and is why we are having this conversation. You made it seem like all men feel this way when they don’t and that people who want a virgin partner has malice intent behind it. You should have stated exactly what you told me as your post not what you originally stated

-5

Anonymous #18 11w

Its almost like i did specify that i was talking about the one way standard in probably 6+ comments and i have issues in general with the glorification of virginity but if u wanna respectfully debate and share ideas youre welcome to dm i just dont wanna get into it here

19

Anonymous #15 11w

It’s just a double standard that men get in society over women. I don’t think you can really shame a man for being with multiple women.

10

Anonymous #28 11w

Its only an issue when he doesnt hold himself to the same standard. Also, where is the line drawn if she had sex with one other person 3 years ago but shes otherwise prefect for him? Is she still off limits?

21

Its very normal for a girl in her 20s to have been with 3 people?

48

Anonymous OP 11w

Even if it was with committed relationship partners

37

Anonymous OP 11w

I wouldn’t say very but it’s definitely not abnormal

9

Anonymous #27 11w

I don’t think a woman not being a virgin degrades her. I just don’t think that if a man wants a woman who is a virgin, that it means he prefers little girls. To me idc if a woman is a virgin or not as long as she doesn’t have more than me. I have 2 so anymore than me and I find you to be less valuable as a dating partner. But that’s just my preference.

-24

Anonymous OP 11w

I disagree. But like i said it’s my preference

-7

Anonymous OP 11w

It's preferance. I think a women has all the right to think the same way. Though it may be difficult to find a virgin, doesn't make seeking wrong. Just because it's normalized to sleep around doesn't mean it's wrong to want purity. You get me? & also, just because one person has done wrong, doesn't mean they can’t want somebody who hasn't done that very thing. Just don't look at the people who don't align as less than. But as far as the line, to each is own.

8

Anonymous #21 11w

Not you proving the point LMFAO

1

Anonymous #28 11w

I guess i also just don’t understand the idea that having sex is a bad thing

22

Anonymous OP 11w

it’s not having sex inherently, it’s having the highest form of physical intimacy with a high amount of people, lack of self control and respect

0

Anonymous #16 11w

Ngl it just sounds like it’s a jealousy/ego thing for you, needing to have the higher number is so corny

64

Anonymous #32 11w

Wtf kind of redpill conspiracies are you buying into because that’s not true😭

21

Anonymous #32 11w

Quite possibly the most outrageous and dumb notification I’ve seen what😭😭

24

Anonymous #19 11w

this is the EXACT point op is making and guys are saying “not all men think like this tho 😢😢”

23

Anonymous #27 11w

I said MORE than me. Meaning we can have the same amount. Never said I had to have the higher number. If I haven’t been with more than 2 than neither should my partner.

-19

Anonymous #16 11w

Thinking it’s okay for you to have a higher number, but not okay for your partner to, is hypocritical and corny

34

Anonymous #19 11w

So men having sex is something to be celebrated and women having sex is shameful? So women are objects to be used and discarded so you can have as much sex as you want while she suffers the social and sometimes physical and financial consequences?

19

Anonymous #32 11w

What in the redpilled incel alpha bro

22

Anonymous #27 11w

I don’t know if you can’t read or something, but I never stated that I had to have the higher number😂

-11

Anonymous #28 11w

& people need to stop equating preference to right and wrong. For example, just because a woman wants a man who is tall, doesn't mean she thinks it is wrong for a man to be short. If a man wants a women with little to no bodies, it doesn't mean he has to view other women as bad and disgusting, it can be an innocent preference, just like women liking taller men. People should stop avoiding sexual accountabiliy, both men and women.

7

Anonymous #29 11w

But thats just a fancy way of saying sex? Like i can call eating the highest form of enjoying a culibary art but its still just eating? Sex means what you want it to mean it doesnt have to be this huge thinf

1

Anonymous #32 11w

biochemically everyone forms a type of attachment through the act of sexual intercourse it’s not any different for women and men and it’s obviously different for every person and people clearly demonstrate the capability to move on anyway?

22

Anonymous #16 11w

Okay so you only want to date someone if they have the exact same number as you, nothing any higher or lower?

24

Anonymous OP 11w

See but like I don’t think wanting a virgin falls into that same category. Because the reasons a man would want a skinny hairless docile wife are pretty much all disgusting, but the reasons a man might want a virgin range from disgusting to highly valuable and spiritual depending wildly on the person. Men who want virgins despite not being one are clinging to this dumb misogynistic idea that women are supposed to be “pure” for men, which is really not in the same category as all that other stuff

3

Anonymous #27 11w

The same or lower.

-15

Anonymous OP 11w

Like I do think infantilization of women/wanting a woman as young as possible is a huge problem. I just don’t think the virginity conversation is part of that issue—I think it’s largely separated. They may overlap occasionally for some people but by and large there’s so much else at play in both conversations that I don’t think it’s useful to make them a single point, y’know? But I don’t disagree with you.

7

Anonymous #16 11w

Okay so like I said, you thinking it’s okay for you to have a higher number but not your partner is so hypocritical and screams insecurity

38

Anonymous #34 11w

Well 1) im a lesbian and 2) ive been with the same person for 4 years and 3) my body count is 2

7

Anonymous OP 11w

I just dont like men and i think most of their preferences are hypocritical and/or pedophillic and i hate to see beautiful women settling for men who suck

11

Anonymous #27 11w

I wouldn’t date someone that has been with more partners than I have 😂 it’s not insecurity it’s my preference. You don’t have to like it lol y’all aren’t gonna force me to accept a high body count just because you have one or you would lol

-15

Anonymous #2 11w

adults have sex. most virgins are younger. unless you’ve both haven’t had sex, it’s weird to be a 25 yr old man expecting a virgin.

57

Anonymous #16 11w

Why do you have that preference though? I think if you really asked yourself that you’d find out beneath all this is insecurity and jealousy

52

Anonymous OP 11w

Why are you equating virginity with whether or not the hymen is intact? As you say, that can be torn any number of ways. Being a virgin is choosing to abstain from sex. Quit shaming people for that choice.

5

Anonymous #27 11w

Because I simply don’t want a partner that has been intimate with a lot of people. Sex is a connector and naturally increases feelings emotionally and spiritually. It’s also in your most vulnerable state. I don’t want to be with someone who has experienced that with a lot of people. It’s my standard. Has nothing to do with insecurity lol

1

Anonymous #16 11w

If it had nothing to do with insecurity then you would be holding yourself to the same standard. I understand wanting someone inexperienced if you’re also inexperienced as like a comfort thing, but you’re saying your partners shouldn’t have any more experience than you based on just a number which is clearly an ego thing. I hope you can dig deeper eventually and improve this double standard

36

Anonymous #6 11w

i’m with you on the obedient part but hairless imo is a bit different

14

Anonymous #11 11w

If you seriously believe having sex ruins vaginas, you need to get off manosphere twitter and get in a sex ed class

14

Anonymous #27 11w

I don’t plan to and the more partners does not equal more experience btw. A person with 1 body can have just as much as someone with 5. I have two bodies and someone with one can be more experienced based on what they’ve learned with that 1 partner

-7

Anonymous #27 11w

And if a woman wouldn’t date me because 2 is too high for them than that’s fine😂 the dating world is completely preferable to a person’s standards. That’s exactly why we have a choice in the first place

6

Anonymous #37 11w

hairlessness is just another arbitrary beauty standard forced upon women and not men 🤷‍♀️ shaving didn't become a thing til the 1900s with gillete's marketing campaigns. the only naturally hairless humans (with no medical conditions) are prepubescent children.

138

Anonymous OP 11w

the problem with today’s society is precisely that: it has become normal to have casual sex with multiple people, and it’s a perfect example of how modern-day feminism is intentionally destroying the family structure, the most fundamental building block of civilization. the fact that it is at all socially acceptable to sleep with multiple people prior to marriage is incredibly backwards and will lead to our demise as a society if not amended immediately.

-10

Anonymous #40 11w

Back when playboy was based

7

Anonymous #41 11w

men have been sleeping around for the entirety of human existence btw. in many cultures men literally took multiple wives, and women are the ones destroying the “family structure” that is sooo important to life?? (it’s also not youre just brainwashed by western propaganda). feminism fights for women to not get slut shamed for having past experiences.

42

Anonymous #7 11w

Yes

4

Anonymous #14 11w

So what! I can demand anything I want and be as selective as I want when I chose to date somebody

-6

Anonymous OP 11w

Have you ever heard of the term manwhore? The social consequences go both ways. Maybe you need better friends if you think this the way the majority of people act

-2

Anonymous OP 11w

You haven’t gotten laid in a while and it’s showing

-1

Anonymous #34 11w

Yeah I’ve read through these comments and this is what I’m gathering

-3

Anonymous #41 11w

yeah i was waiting for someone to say some dumb shit like this. completely ahistorical bs. people are having less sex, casual or otherwise, than ever before, you can look this up but i’m confident you have seen the headlines. it’s never been the case that people weren’t having casual sex. hell, brothels were probably more popular in the time periods you’re romanticizing. the nuclear family is just one of many possible and perfectly viable family structures, and it’s a new one at that.

47

Anonymous OP 11w

Same person for four years is a miracle that’s just not realistic in today’s society and it is both genders faults

-1

Anonymous #45 11w

The amount of sex you have or don’t have doesn’t determine your worth as a person, I find it weird that men make assumptions like this when they feel offended

13

Anonymous #47 11w

Im a man, im not saving myself for marriage, but i save myself for at least 1 year of dating. I also don’t tell them i have a timeframe to avoid “waiting down the clock.” I think this is the best practice for having self restraint if you’re not spiritual

10

You're literally a pdfile LOL

23

Anonymous #42 11w

yeah that’s a good take. i’m christian but i just never wanted to wait for marriage i guess, i think sex can be a really special part of a relationship i just want to trust someone first, but atp i think the next man i trust might just be my husband

17

Anonymous #47 11w

Yeah I agree that sex is a large part of relationship, I definitely wouldn’t want the weird “ok we’re married, let’s sex😈😈” which is why I keep it the way I do. Keeps you from being 3-5 bodies to maybe 1 or 2 if unlucky

7

Anonymous #30 11w

This is clearly not what we are talking, nice rage bait

3

Anonymous #11 11w

scientifically inaccurate argue with my cock and balls about it

9

Anonymous #46 11w

W rage bait 🤣🤣🤣

6

Anonymous #4 11w

Why is this getting downvoted😭😭

-4

Anonymous #46 11w

Neanderthal? For having values you disagree with?

-1

Anonymous #50 11w

I literally wish i could ss this and send it to your mom how some of yall talk about women

19

Anonymous #38 11w

Holy airball im literally a lesbian in a 4 year relationship

24

Anonymous #49 11w

Yeah and thats fine bc youre holding yourself to the same standard ive said that like 8 times atp

12

Anonymous #39 11w

Yeah dude

5

Anonymous #42 11w

Like- thats terrible that it happened but it has nothing to do with the topic because that doesnt count and shouldnt factor into anyone’s perceived purity or worth

4

Anonymous #16 11w

I said this 3 times but 1)lesbian 2) 4 year relationship 3) body count of 2 4) just dont like men

7

Anonymous #45 11w

1) lesbian 2) body count of 2 3) 4 year committed relationship 4) slut shaming makes women feel worse i promise i dont gaf if you wanna be a virgin i just dont think men should control you

7

Anonymous #19 11w

Yesterday actually

10

Anonymous #19 11w

Also get ratioed

7

Anonymous #42 11w

Manwhore is not a serious term with genuine social consequences like slut and whore are and if you think they are you should talk to a woman ❤️

12

Anonymous #51 11w

Okay but why do you have those preferences

11

Anonymous #19 11w

Yeah in just saying its not that im “ran through” its just that i dont like seeing guys treat women like shit and hold a double standard

9

Anonymous #14 11w

Yall wouldnt know anything “biochemically” if it slapped you do your research somewhere other than facebook and the bible

12

Anonymous #53 11w

Respectfully, adulthood is different for everyone and your sexual history (or lack thereof) has nothing to do with your age

5

Anonymous OP 11w

It lowkey doesn't matter. I can't speak for everyone, in the same way that you don't have the right to arbitrate people's choices. The way rad fems have chosen to die on the hill of stigmatizing men dating any women other than 30+ y/o single moms is bizarre, and you can't win.

0

Anonymous OP 11w

That was for 27 not 14 sorry

11

Anonymous OP 11w

Also I am not a player so there are no double standards coming from me. On that, I agree: it would be odd to demand something which you didn't do yourself.

7

Anonymous OP 11w

Wait then why do you even give a shit lmao?

-3

Anonymous #53 11w

Okay but take that to the extreme to the same degree as hairless and skinny- the standard is prepubescent… most people are having sex after puberty

1

Anonymous OP 11w

So in that way yes, not being a virgin is mostly associated woth either thw very religous or children. If they are very religous the stabdard should be applied both ways

1

Anonymous #51 11w

I dont care if you date a consenting adult but if u only like tiny hairless virgin women im gonna throw up a few redflags

12

Anonymous OP 11w

Thats all im saying

5

Anonymous #52 11w

God forbid i just am a hater and wanna protect women

19

Anonymous OP 11w

I like thiccness and bushes... we're good

5

Anonymous #51 11w

Word me too

1

Anonymous OP 11w

🤝

1

Anonymous OP 11w

Lmao

6

Anonymous #52 11w

Is the concept of caring about people other than yourself that foreign to you

14

Anonymous OP 11w

I too love spreading misinformation

-2

Anonymous #42 11w

probably because it’s calling somebody ran through?

1

Anonymous #54 11w

A fact is a fact?

-3

Anonymous #42 11w

no, you’re just being rude

1

Anonymous OP 11w

unfortunately the fact is there ARE people who perceive those who’ve been raped or sexually assaulted as no longer being virgins/as a sort of “damaged goods,” and it all stems from the same kind of bullshit as virginity being a thing in the first place. thankfully we’re moving away from that explicit attitude as a culture but i think people are just. still weird about this topic subconsciously from the way i see people talk about it sometimes

12

Anonymous OP 11w

its so funny that i’ve seen you being accused of both having some exorbitant body count AND of not having enough sex it’s a great encapsulation of how you just cannot win as a woman

6

Anonymous #2 11w

i was gonna give a more well reasoned answer but yeah actually. for having values i disagree with. that’s the long and short of it. not that there are people just spewing the same ahistorical, scientifically inaccurate, irrational bs ideas that have been around since before we even had proper plumbing and which have been disapproved, it’s just cause people disagree with me personally.

17

so what exactly is pedophilic about what i’ve said.

19

Anonymous #56 11w

I don’t understand this response. She won’t know if I’m doing something weird/wrong unless she has sex with others first???

10

Anonymous #40 11w

yea some people think that. some don’t. i think both genders should shave as a cleanly norm. hair traps germs and gunk. trim it or shave it. -a dude

8

Anonymous #37 11w

Okay literally!! I shave everyday for sensory reasons and people always view it weird

5

Anonymous #54 11w

Yeah? How else would she know? It’s very rare for sex education to be super comprehensive

7

Anonymous #56 11w

She’d know by learning with me??? Why would i want her to learn with someone else??????

5

Anonymous #54 11w

i think there’s nuance to either side of this particular argument but the point is that while YOU might care about your partner and her pleasure, be open and willing to learn how to better/best pleasure her (from her), there are women who end up with men who AREN’T like this and because they don’t have any prior experience they might think (or be led to believe) that sex is just supposed to be unpleasurable for them, that they don’t have a say in it, or that it’s their fault if it’s that way

11

Anonymous OP 11w

the double standards make me SO mad. also the fact that half the dating pool looks down on virgins like crazy and will only chase girls who put out, but then turn right around and say non virgins aren’t wife material??? don’t even get me started on men thinking that if you’re hot & friendly you’re automatically getting with everyone even if you ARE a virgin. you can’t win

12

Anonymous #46 11w

that’s why some people are saying it’s a bit weird and can also be this sign of a potentially controlling, insecure and mediocre man. a woman with experience is a woman who can potentially be more discerning and demanding/assertive about her own wants and needs, who can and will leave for better, rather than setting herself aside and settling for a man who doesn’t actually care about her beyond her capacity to pleasure and serve him and him alone.

5

Anonymous #46 11w

and you might be like “oh who is actually thinking like this” it’s. the andrew tate types amongst others. like you will actually see these alpha male podcaster bros talking about wanting young women explicitly because of their lack of knowledge/experience, so that they can “mold” and “train” them like they’re fucking dogs. nb4 “well those are the extremes” those extremes made their way into fucking elementary and middle school classrooms, and the ideas they’re parroting aren’t even new

12

Anonymous #46 11w

that said i don’t think you Have to have had sex in order to get to know your own body and what you loke and dislike, and how to communicate that to your partner(s). there are resources out there for learning these things and you can explore your own body. but it is Also true that we live in a society with bad sex ed and which is weird about sexual exploration and which often tells women to set their own pleasure aside, be ashamed of it, act like it doesn’t exist, etc. soooo

6

Anonymous OP 11w

Respectfully adding number 4 on there is just stupid. I can understand the other 3 which I didn’t know, but as soon as you turn it into a gender thing it’s like 😐

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Anonymous #26 11w

acting like op is being unreasonable meanwhile i’m assuming it’s majority men in these comments with the audacity to share such rancid takes and proving her point to the T. mind you most people who say they don’t like men don’t even mean a personal distatate for individual men, but the harmful ways that men are socialized and behave, the way they’re prioritized in society

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Anonymous #46 11w

Only thing unreasonable was #4 🫡

0

Anonymous #37 11w

I mean, I personally think dudes should be trimming a lot more than women since we sweat so much more on average but you’re wrong with pubes. Feel free to trim, but if you’re shaving, it actually has the opposite effect where you’re losing protection. Regardless of whether or not you trim or keep a bush you just need to make sure to shower. As a bisexual whore, I prefer women with bush versus most dudes who think showering is optional and store more cheese on dick than the US reserve.

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Anonymous #2 11w

I don’t know why you don’t see the correlation between the two which is really weird to me because it’s everywhere in our culture. Purity culture and pedophilia go hand-in-hand skipping down our sidewalk every day man. Dude like two generations ago mamaw was pregnant at 15-23. You might see some older virgins now but like that’s much more common now only because women have been given more rights and have been slightly more freed of purity culture and predatory practices like Mamaw’s “love story”

1

Anonymous #16 11w

You don’t want someone who experienced having intimacy? Because the intimacy needs to be reserved for you? Like yeah bro sex can be like really deep for some people but why does it matter if she has more experience being intimate than you? Also, what if they were just hook ups does that change anything for you?

0

Anonymous #41 11w

I hate to tell ya but we’ve been having casual sex as dudes for forever. Also, the family structure has been ever changing since forever and marriage is new- we have had so many different varieties of family between nuclear extended found or whatever since the dawn of time. We don’t need a copy paste of a white picket fence 2 parent 2.5 child structure everywhere to function as a society. Our founding fathers cheated left and right even raping innocents-“family values” never existed for dudes

1

Anonymous #18 11w

The only way that double standards continue to exist is if you push against them, bro. Also, the answer to slut shaming is not slut shaming dudes too. 💀 just let people have sex. It’s not that deep. If two people want that as consenting adults that’s fine but you can’t pretend that the double standard doesn’t exist by ignoring it

0

Anonymous #60 11w

Stop continuing to exist*

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Anonymous #2 11w

How is OP shaming people for being virgins by telling people to not shame people who aren’t? The only shame that he might be giving is to ppl who support the double standard and villainize sex

1

Anonymous #11 11w

I agreed with the first half and then you called someone who has sex a slob. I’m pretty sure OP kind of put this out there to get rid of the double standard and Stop villainizing people having sex. This is not puritan anymore. Can we please just like Stop attributing negative connotation to a completely neutral act between two consenting adults for the love of God.

5

Anonymous #14 11w

Purity culture and pedophilia have always gone hand-in-hand bro. Also, considering most of our mammals got married between the ages of 15 to 23 and immediately started popping out some kids being an older virgin is more common nowadays- but being a young virgin was the expectation for women until you start popping out, babies left and right for your husband

5

Anonymous #60 11w

Listen I can’t make stupid smart. So I’m not arguing with you stupid. Where in any of my comments am I telling people to not have sex. Yall love to warp what people say that you disagree with into some other argument. Always moving and shifting the goal post to make it seem like I said something “underlying” in my comments or to continue “arguing” I said and I will stand firmly on it. You want to be a slut/sleep around be a slut just don’t be mad that someone doesn’t want to be with you.

-1

Anonymous #60 11w

Mamaws*

5

Anonymous #18 11w

Preference exists and just because you’re not someone’s preferred choice doesn’t mean someone else wouldn’t want you literally the whole point to my statements. That’s like saying “I like my partner hygienic!” And someone crying out because they like to rub themselves in dirt that that person doesn’t want them.

0

Anonymous #43 11w

The more sex you have doesn’t change anything except maybe experience. Can we like not tell people there’s something fundamentally wrong with him if they cannot form an emotional connection through sex or promote purity culture that tells people that they will lose the ability to form any connection if they so much as look at a penis or vagina? Also if it works so well, why are the divorce rates so high in religious communities that uphold purity culture and tell CSA survivors they’re gum wads?

1

Anonymous #60 11w

Them*

1

Anonymous #54 11w

Why is sex outside of marriage gross? What makes a ring change sex into being pure? As far as I’m aware, it’s all sticky and requires new bedsheets and towels.

5

Anonymous #32 11w

everything everyone else under here has said but also i just think it’s incredible how people try to oversimplify the vastness of human emotion and experience because of their own world view they want reality to conform to. there are people who remain deeply emotjonally attached to those they’ve never even dreamed of having sex with, and there are people who fuck casually with little to no real regard for their partners. sex isn’t the end all be all of love and intimacy

4

Anonymous #19 11w

You say “fault” like sex is a bad thing and not a completely neutral act. Why do we romanticize the days when men had mistresses, raped strangers bc they were “too tempting” with an ankle, and we blamed their wife who was like a fucking 17 year old child for “letting their husband be led astray”. We are mammals, bro. Your God may be in your bedroom 24/7 like a creep but the god i grew up on is like chill and normal and doesn’t give a shit if you’re gay or have sex

0

Anonymous #53 11w

I’m just replying to everyone at this point that keeps on trying to go for the pedophilic argument. Purity culture is inherently pedophilic, bro. I would love for you to look at a single image of a purity promise ball between a daughter and her father! Almost all of it is rooted in religion patriarchy and pedophilia. they all go, hand in hand girl.

6

Anonymous #60 11w

The idea of having sex with someone you’re not committed to is gross to me.

1

Anonymous #54 11w

1: i think it’s fine if you don’t PERSONALLY like it as long as you’re not then looking down on others who have sex outside of marriage 2: you gave a bit of a circular reason here, just saying “it’s gross because it’s gross.” WHY is it gross though what about a lack of commitment is gross to you is it a physical thing? an emotional thing? it sounds right now like you’ve just ascribed morality to a gut feeling you have

1

Anonymous #8 11w

Bro, you’re going to be flabbergasted when I show you Reddit and Ben Shapiro

1

Anonymous OP 11w

Are you five years old “get ratioed” 😭

1

Anonymous #46 11w

To add onto that, it puts people who have trouble forming intimacy during sex in a position where they’re seen as deficient. Tell me I could enjoy a game of Monopoly or we could have fucking sex. I don’t give a shit either way. It’s an activity. One is just with less clothes involved. I don’t find intimacy from sex. I find it from my old girlfriend who remembered my favorite cake is cheesecake and got it for my birthday or my old boyfriend who always got my favorite drink at the bar!

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Anonymous #46 11w

I think risking bringing children into the world with someone you’re not committed too is extremely irresponsible. It’s also just more romantic to only have done things with one person in my eyes.

1

Anonymous #54 11w

(pls keep in mind at least right now im not trying to reason you out of what you’re saying i’m just also sharing my thoughts)

1

Anonymous #46 11w

i think your first point is fair to an extent but also, there is all manner of birth control we have nowadays and have had for a while, so you can have sex with little to no risk of having kids if you don’t want ‘em for whatever reason furthermore even people in marriages cheat and can be irresponsible with how they raise their children. take it from me, who has a sister who’s husband is abusive, has cheated, and who is neglectful of their kids…and these are “good christians”

1

Anonymous #46 11w

on the other hand my mom and dad were never married and my own personal gripes aside with certain things, i was never left wanting as i grew up. they might not be committed to each other, but they were/are committed to raising me alright, and were/are respectful of each other regardless of commitment. obviously this is my own annectdotal experience of course, but like that, it makes it hard for me to think commitment and responsibility only exists in the bounds of marriage

1

Anonymous OP 11w

Yeah, unfortunately, it’s incredibly relevant to the argument where purity culture is concerned and everything you put in your OG post has to do with purity culture

1

Anonymous #42 11w

Did you realize that when you said manwhore you had to put man in front of it? You had to distinguish that we are talking about a man because the default for the word whore has been mainly targeted for women. Also, while we’re at it, let’s look at the etymology of the word and the history of how long whore has been around versus manwhore.

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Anonymous #46 11w

as for your second point, i do think that’s cute as well, but also subjective. but i am coming it at it from the point of never having had sex before myself and also of the attitude that sex is what you make it…and i don’t know it feels much more optimistic and romantic to like. choose which sexual experiences you hold to be special or not based on your own values/judgement? if that makes sense

1

Anonymous #46 11w

maybe i’d had sex with X person, but it was while i was young and inexperienced and i wasn’t that into them. or maybe that is still an experience that’s valuable to me. i don’t think that should then mean that if/when i get with Y person i think will be my long term partner, or just someone i love a lot, that experience with X should inherently devalue this one that i’m having right now. it’s a different thing with a different person who means something different

1

Anonymous #60 11w

EXACTLYYY seriously i wanted to follow up with how if sex was really this always magical thing that permanently pair bonds people together or whatever, you wouldn’t have so many accounts of people having dead bedrooms and then ultimately failing marriages on account of people (often men) not meeting the other needs of their partners (often women). precisely things like remembering their favorite dessert or favorite drink. the sex would be enough but it ends up being unimportant

10

Anonymous #60 11w

(also this is soooo cute 😭😭😭)

4

Anonymous #18 11w

Oh so sorry sir lemme rephrase stop being a little bitch about ppl having sex. Also I can question your preferences for puritan culture the same way I question anyone who sleeps with only Asians or chases trans ppl. Just bc it’s your “preference” doesn’t mean it’s not rooted in something gross.

6

Anonymous #50 11w

Male loneliness epidemic this and that but then yall act like this and wondr why nobody wants your toxic ass.

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Anonymous #63 11w

For example of the extreme circumstances, i accidentally ate a food i am allergic to and started going into anaphylaxis. was arguing bc i didnt want to make a scene in front of friends. He was very very firm and calm about it, just said “I’m not arguing with you. Get in the car or i will put you in the car”. first off, hot. Can we get a private ER room? second, yeah valid. i didnt need to be arguing i literally almost died.

1

Anonymous #63 11w

But that’s not because he’s a man who has ownership over you, it’s bc he’s your partner who loves you and cares about you. It’s different then the expectation that if he just says jump, you don’t even ask how high before you start jumping

2