Autistic girl community on Sidechat | What’s the hardest part about Romantic relationships for you? Mine is definitely masking symptoms and being able to hold my own and keeping a healthy balance between independence and clingy

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Autistic girl community 1d

What’s the hardest part about Romantic relationships for you? Mine is definitely masking symptoms and being able to hold my own and keeping a healthy balance between independence and clingy

Anonymous 1d

I wouldn’t be in a LTR where I had to mask. Healthy boundaries are great too but if someone can’t handle my vocal stims and occasional info dumps then they’re not really a partner for me. Plus, I usually only date ND peeps anyway and I find both awkwardness and info dumps cute so… why would I want to mask? I’d feel like a failure as a partner if they felt they had to.

Anonymous 1d

Not getting upset at my husband way of thinking because he was raised differently. My family = do stuff then relax His family = relax then do stuff then relax again then do more stuff.

Anonymous 1d

if i have to message someone on the internet every day as opposed to face to face conversation, i go insane. i can’t be in relationships :/

Anonymous 1d

Never been in one😔 but I feel as tho those are potential problems I could have when that day comes

Anonymous 23h

Would love to answer. Unfortunately have yet to be in a relationship

Anonymous 17h

I’m married & for me it’s… a lot. It’s my sense of justice, my inability to “go with the flow” my refusal to mask (this is only an issue with his family tho) and how hard it is to pick up on cues that he’s irritated, tired, frustrated, etc

Anonymous

#3 1d

I am trying to be neater as a person but that’s a consideration thing, it’s not me not being my weird as hell self.

Anonymous

#2 1d

this would drive me crazy

Anonymous

#2 1d

This is the same for me. On vacation my family has everything planned to the minute, something I always hated bc I’m too spontaneous (ADHD) for that. But on my fiance’s family vacations they are so spontaneous it’s actually aggravating, they’ll contradict themselves and leave me scrambling to catch up and figure it out, and then they’re like “it’s not that big of a deal” well it can be SOMETIMES

Anonymous

#6 1d

My mom is an outdoorsy exercise adventurer. It wasn’t till I went out alone and with others that I discovered I am an outdoorsy exploration/observation adventurer. I love walking with others who stop and observe things rather than “we need to walk __ miles today so hurry up so we can get to the next hike!” My bff is firmly city girl and *might* glamp with me but doesn’t actually like nature much. I hope to find another hobbit hiker like myself.

Anonymous

#6 1d

Love that you bring up adhd because this is why his family does it that way. They need one fun active then one annoy active and repeat so they can actually get stuff done. Because if not it gets overwhelming to them. Honestly after I understood it it doesn't bother me at all. My family way of doing stuff is unhealthy. My mom anxiety controlled our house. I still feel more relaxed when things are planned and done. But I need the breaks for my body health and mental health.

Anonymous

#2 11h

Idk if they have adhd. It’s more like. Ok for example. Went on their family vaca again this year. Knew we’d go to this one restaurant they all love. The ONLY outfit I had planned for the whole trip was a nice outfit for this nice restaurant. One day they’re like “hm what should we have for dinner” and decided they didn’t want to cook burgers anymore and we should go out. We walk around this plaza and they can’t decide so they’re like “well let’s just go to the nice restaurant” even tho they were

Anonymous

#2 11h

-supposed to wait for this cousin coming in the next day so he could go w us. Which like we ended up going again to the restaurant so it’s whatever but I was so annoyed thinking “if y’all didn’t just free ball things I would be wearing a nicer outfit and not literal hiking shorts and a tank top still smelling like beach in a nice restaurant!” But they just don’t plan ANYTHING. I always hated plans until I went on their family vacation and realized SOME planning is kinda nice

Anonymous

#2 11h

But I also have like hella anxiety so, yk, lol