Ask Women on Sidechat | Friends with benefits is crying, literally crying, because I won’t go down on her. I’m just not into it, I find it repulsive. But why take it so personally, please explain this to me?

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Ask Women 4w

Friends with benefits is crying, literally crying, because I won’t go down on her. I’m just not into it, I find it repulsive. But why take it so personally, please explain this to me?

Anonymous 4w

She thinks you find her pussy disgusting and is embarrassed/feels gross? She had some bad experience? Maybe she feels like you don’t care about her enjoyment? She could be someone who hates giving head and just realized that saying no wouldn’t make somebody leave? Idk man I’m just spitballing but that’s all I could think of.

Anonymous 4w

does she give you head?

Anonymous 4w

I mean there are a few things. It’s totally ok to not want to go down on her but I would really question why you’re friends with benefits with someone who wants it so bad. Sounds uncomfortable for you and not very “beneficial” for her. As for why she’s crying I can think of a few reasons possible

Anonymous 4w

That’s a little odd ngl

Anonymous 4w

Hey dude, genuinely… grow a pair! You’re having sex with a partner already! Get down there and make it enjoyable for her too! It is something that evidently matters to her. Is that REALLY the hill you want to die on?!

Anonymous 4w

I should put some context into this. We have amazing sex. Like amazing, mind-blown, electrifying sex. We have been for like 8 months now. It was only recently out of nowhere that she asked for this. We don’t do oral at all and she basically asked to start and I was kind of like ehh nah, I’m fine with not starting.

Anonymous 3w

Most of the guys too, but that’s beside the point

Anonymous

#5 4w

One is that women often are not taught how to express their desires or that it’s even ok to have desires, so she might feel some level of shame over this, and you refusing to do it may just reinforce that shame. Another may just be that she’s disappointed and this is how her body releases sexual frustration. That’s how I am. I feel bad about it bc it feels manipulative but I just naturally cry when I’m let down sexually, it’s my bodies release I don’t have much control. Or maybe she’s just a

Anonymous

#5 4w

Creep trying to pressure you into doing it. But honestly as a woman who’s felt with how hard it can be as a woman to be sexually open, I doubt it’s that unless she’s pressuring you in other ways too

Anonymous

#5 4w

Anyway for a lot of women penetration alone is not satisfying, so if you won’t do oral it probably feels for her like very one sided benefits. I’m not gonna tell you to do something you’re uncomfortable with sexually bc I don’t think anyone should put themselves in that situation, but yall are probably not compatible for a fwb arrangement

Anonymous

#4 4w

I mean I don’t think anyone should feel like they have to do something sexually that they are not comfortable with, that’s a horrible experience for both people.

Anonymous

#5 4w

Sure. I see your point but if a “man” find a woman’s body part/ sex “repulsive”, he’s simply not mature enough to be having sex

Anonymous

#4 4w

I find cum in my mouth to offputting to do so I don’t let any guy finish there. I don’t think that makes me too immature for sex. We all have preferences. Wouldn’t EVER want to sleep with a guy who won’t do oral? Hell no, do I think he should force himself to if it’s genuinely uncomfortable for him? No. I do think it’s weird he calls it repulsive though, like I see why she’s crying

Anonymous

#4 4w

A lot of women think dicks are repulsive and don’t like giving head, and that’s completely fine, why is this any different?

Anonymous

OP 4w

IF she wants to end our current relation because I’m not open to oral, I’m totally fine with that, whatever she is most comfortable with.

Anonymous

OP 4w

I should mention that I don’t find her repulsive at all, she’s beautiful. I think what I find repulsive is this: we have an agreement that we can still hook up with other people so I don’t want to go down on her while there is the possibility that she is hooking up with someone else. What I know is that she hooked up with one and only one guy when we FIRST started our current fwb status but apparently she hasn’t been with anyone else but it’s not like really know what the truth is and I dont ask

Anonymous

OP 4w

What I was surprised by, though, was the fact that when she brought up this up and I gently told her I wasn’t interested, she went into full blown crisis mode and took everything personally and I had to calm her down. It was….wild. It’s been awkward ever since but we’re still continuing being fwb. So yeah. I think that’s everything.