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Am I in the wrong here? It’s not the first time I’ve gotten criticism like this (never this harsh/direct, though), and I never know how to respond
157 upvotes, 70 comments. Sidechat image post by Anonymous in Ask Women. "Am I in the wrong here? It’s not the first time I’ve gotten criticism like this (never this harsh/direct, though), and I never know how to respond"
upvote 157 downvote

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Anonymous 20h

yeah i don’t think this is a you problem, i think it shows that they are definitely a bad match for you

upvote 219 downvote
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Anonymous 21h

She’s weird wtf

upvote 164 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

That’s just a weird thing to say. You did the right thing

upvote 140 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

Holy hell. No… you’re good. As a girlie she’s wildly out of her mind. You respected her space. You were polite with the rejection. And she wanted you to beg for her attention. She’s toxic. The fact that this has happened more than once with you is pathetic. Sometimes, girls are the problem. The only thing I can even remotely think is maybe next time say “that’s a shame, I thought there was something, but I respect your choice.” Or something along those lines. Seriously tho you’re good.

upvote 132 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

Yeah no your being respectful

upvote 101 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

some women still have work to do in dismantling their own sexism, from what we know in this screenshot u did nothing wrong.

upvote 85 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

You didn’t do anything wrong. She’s weird asf for this

upvote 64 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

Sounds like you did the right thing and she’s just a weird judgmental person.

upvote 44 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

I’m sorry, respecting boundaries is now bad??? This is news to me

upvote 43 downvote
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Anonymous 20h

You gave a respectful send off idk why she felt the need to keep pushing 😭

upvote 40 downvote
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Anonymous 19h

This girl is a walking red flag, thank god she showed you her true colors before. You’re not in the wrong, and she’s not someone I would associate myself with. If she keeps this attitude she’ll either end up single or in a bad situation.

upvote 37 downvote
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Anonymous 19h

Its giving externalizing the internalized misogyny on her part lol. U dont want her

upvote 29 downvote
Anonymous 19h

Yeah don’t listen to her, she kind of sounds weird and yucky. You absolutely did the right thing in being respectful and polite. Being pushy and chasing after a rejection are not favorable actions at all really.

upvote 27 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

What😭 ur definitely not in the wrong, im sure she would have complained and called you grapey if you had tried to touch her—u dodged a bullet

upvote 20 downvote
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Anonymous 16h

You were respectful, she was weird, you’re not in the wrong. Keep being a respectful and kind person ❤️

upvote 20 downvote
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Anonymous 15h

As a girl, it seems like she’s so used to men being disrespectful and taking what they want that she can’t fathom a respectful one

upvote 19 downvote
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Anonymous 16h

For a first date that kinda wild for her to say. As a lesbian (asexual), I would NEVER say anything like that to a woman I went out with!! That’s crazy?!

upvote 15 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

You’re doing great, I promise someone is going to cherish your respectful ass

upvote 14 downvote
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Anonymous 12h

As a woman, this is so unfair to you lol. She rejected you and you respected her answer. What were you supposed to do, argue with her about whether she’s attracted to you? And not assuming you can touch her on a first date isn’t 'feminine/gay,’ either.

upvote 14 downvote
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Anonymous 12h

I wish a man was that respectful to me😭😭

upvote 13 downvote
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Anonymous 12h

Not at allll. Seems like the type of girl who just causes problems to get attention.

upvote 12 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

It’s giving roles reversed of women saying no means no, but after they reject a guy they wonder why he doesn’t try to be persistent lol pretty pathetic either way

upvote 11 downvote
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Anonymous 16h

nah that’s a her problem. why tf would you try to touch someone on a first date or argue when they reject something

upvote 11 downvote
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Anonymous 13h

uhmmmm i think shes the problem

upvote 11 downvote
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Anonymous 7h

Did she want you to push her boundaries and not take no for an answer?? Is being respectful gay now? 😭

upvote 11 downvote
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Anonymous 14h

You seem super nice she’s a weirdo

upvote 10 downvote
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Anonymous 12h

nah king you're doing what you're supposed to be doing

upvote 10 downvote
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Anonymous 16h

Wtf run bro, this is not ok.

upvote 9 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

I saw this on Twitter like days ago lmao this isn’t you

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous 14h

Jeez…. And I thought the worst match I got was when the girl was asking about the other guy in the pic and said “he’s more handsome than you and you’re more uglier”

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous 14h

no you are not in the wrong that is so bizarre😭 what does she want you to do beg for a second chance??

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous 13h

She’s a pos

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous 13h

as a girl you’re not in the wrong at all that’s super weird of her to say. she should have just said the connection wasn’t there instead of making a problem out of you being respectful. in general girls appreciate you not skiing them uncomfortable and not being super touchy or anything on a first date

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous 10h

Honestly no… like TF?! If she doesn’t want to be with me I ain’t gonna beg!! I only beg for the Lord’s forgiveness and mercy not for some hoe’s attention! TF?!

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous 1h

What app is this

upvote 7 downvote
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Anonymous 9h

Holy shit you dodged a bullet, gg my dude, keep being you and keep being respectful my good sir 🫡 (need more men to normalize this kind of behavior in a world like this… not everything’s gotta be sexual smh..)

upvote 4 downvote
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Anonymous 13h

Twitter repost

upvote 3 downvote
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Anonymous 15h

if she was making moves and you weren’t reciprocating (standing/sitting right up against you, stuff like that) then yeah maybe she didn’t feel chemistry because she didn’t feel wanted. but other than that, it’s always fine to wait until it feels right to make moves and just focus on getting to know one another

upvote 2 downvote
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Deleted 18h

Comment Deleted

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Anonymous 9h

you’re not wrong but it’s lowkey weird that you were like “alright!” imo

upvote -2 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #9 19h

Also please know your response is the DREAM response for a lot of us when turning someone down, do not let this crazy person make you think respecting boundaries is bad

upvote 44 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

Literally NOTHING feminine about respect.

upvote 47 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

Idk man I “code switch” sometimes, but it just happens on its own. Whenever I’m by myself, I’m quite masculine. It’s repressed, but it’s definitely in there.

upvote 13 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #16 17h

I put it on twitter weeks ago lol

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Anonymous replying to -> #17 17h

No does mean no, though.

upvote 14 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

🚨🚨RED PILLED ALERT 🚨🚨RED PILLED ALERT 🚨🚨 Please fuck off and get your brain fixed

upvote 23 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 17h

Yes, and there’s a clear difference between the boundary of consent and just a clear refusal of a relationship request

upvote 4 downvote
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Anonymous 16h

One, there’s nothing wrong with being feminine. It’s okay to have a mix. It doesn’t make people “gay” or whatever, like come on.. and this beta shit is so fucking stupid.. like grow the hell up..

upvote 22 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> phosphoros 16h

There is nothing wrong with being feminine. Like I said, some girls like that. It’s better to be up front about it than to be a feminine dude trying to be masculine. Girls and guys see right through that. Contrary to popular belief in 2026, although you may try, you can’t hide who you are on the inside.

upvote -9 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #23 16h

As a girl just ignore her. Bc wth

upvote 9 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> phosphoros 15h

I more meant in general. I got confused and thought op was a woman! Sorry king❤️

upvote 10 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> phosphoros 15h

Oh, no worries.

upvote 6 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #14 15h

Also, we don't actually know if he was being feminine/gay. But from the context, she’s only saying he didn’t try to touch her. like it’s their first date.. like come on💀

upvote 15 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 15h

Hope you find a woman who’s not odd like her, man! You seem chill. Asking if you did anything wrong is huge! Keep it up🫶

upvote 12 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #24 15h

Eh I think you mean well but this sounds like an excuse and I think if we’re gonna ask men to be respectful we shouldn’t excuse when girls act a fool and are rude. Like imagine if OP got this over and over again and girls excused behavior like this then men like OP are gonna start changing their gentleman like behavior. We need more men like OP

upvote 12 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 15h

Yesss! Op is great! I mean I’ve never heard of a lot of men coming on platforms to ask if what he did was wrong or made someone uncomfortable! It’s great!

upvote 9 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 15h

What? I am in no way excusing her

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Anonymous replying to -> #24 15h

I didn’t see it that way! I mean we literally know nothing about the actual situation! Lol

upvote 4 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #24 15h

Oh the whole “she just acting like this cause men treated her bad in the past” I read as an excuse for her behavior. My bad

upvote 7 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 15h

And now I read that and it sounds sassy. I’m not trying to be lol

upvote 6 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 15h

No I js meant she’s romanticised toxic guys

upvote 6 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #24 15h

Well honestly. Hope the toxic girl goes and collects the toxic guy 😭. Gives us one less toxic man to have to deal with.

upvote 7 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 15h

And on that note, now I support her. She’s gonna be the garbage collector. More power to her 😂😂

upvote 5 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 15h

😂

upvote 7 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #25 14h

I see what you’re saying, but I’m just not a very physical person, especially not on a first date. That’s just a personal boundary I have, but I recognize that can come off as a lack of interest, which is why I made sure to be clear that I had a good time and would love to see her again

upvote 15 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 14h

Nah I just hope she finds someone who can help her grow as a person.

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> phosphoros 14h

Thank you! I appreciate the kind words

upvote 12 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #7 14h

If anything respect is more MASCULINE cause it proves you don’t feel inadequate

upvote 25 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 13h

Of course!!

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #31 13h

*making not skiing lol

upvote 9 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #14 7h

If that were true, they’d see me as masculine.

upvote 5 downvote