Ask Women on Sidechat | Does anyone else feel that men are just genuinely incapable of love and empathy? I’m being extremely serious when I ask this. I’ve lost all hope.

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Ask Women 5d

Does anyone else feel that men are just genuinely incapable of love and empathy? I’m being extremely serious when I ask this. I’ve lost all hope.

Anonymous 5d

I'm a man, very capable of love and empathy... Sometimes I wonder the same thing about women. But then I use my empathy a bit and realize that it's likely that women feel the same way I do. I'm 5'6" and have had a hard time dating. I'm also 22 and just starting my career but someday I'll have more of what women likely want in a relationship and I'm looking forward to sharing what I will have with the right partner..

🌪️

Anonymous 5d

i actually think my bf is much more empathetic than i am

Anonymous 5d

Sounds like you need to be around a wider variety of men tbh. Not to say there aren’t a LOT of toxic ones out there. But if you’ve run into so many of them and so few good/neutral ones that you’re questioning if an ENTIRE group can feel love and empathy AT ALL a change in environment may help? There are definitely men capable of love and empathy out there. You just gotta know how to weave around the ones who are shitty.

Anonymous 5d

Yes

Anonymous 5d

No, I just don’t think some guys know how to express it as well.

Anonymous 5d

I must’ve just gotten lucky or something cause the 2 main men in my life are my bf and my dad and they’re incredibly empathetic

Anonymous 5d

I thought this until i met my bf, there are good ones out there ❤️

Anonymous 5d

My boyfriend and his friends, my guy friends, and my dad are some of the most caring and empathetic people I know. My sister, step mom, and step aunt are some of the most self-centered. So it’s definitely not a “‘man” problem—even if some men are more awkward at knowing how to express it.

Anonymous 5d

it really depends on the person, man or woman. if you want love and empathy look for people willing to give love and empathy.

Anonymous 5d

Girlie me too we should be friends bc all my friends don’t agree and have bfs 🫩🫩

Anonymous 5d

I think the same on women. It is what it is.

Anonymous 5d

Did that shit then got cheated on twin, can’t let myself open up only to get ostracized and fucked over again

Anonymous 4d

All the people in the comments telling you to branch out like that’s gonna fix anything, it quite literally just makes it worse. I’ve had people tell me the same thing about women lmao, “maybe you need to go out and find women who aren’t like that” fuck off 😭. It’s like the more you look the more bs you find. And social media makes it like 10x worse.

🍓

Anonymous 5d

Not at all. I’ve literally never thought that. Some men seem incapable of empathy but I’ve met plenty of women for who that applies for as well.

Anonymous

strawberry_hair 5d

Yeah, I think all genders have those types of people. It’s just from my experience, it’s hard to find genuine, kind men in general. It all feels performative. It’s hard to find women like that too sometimes, but it might just be the area I live in.

Anonymous

#2 5d

I’m sorry you’ve had those feelings & bad experiences with women. We can kinda suck sometimes too. People in general can. I appreciate your comment. I can’t speak for others, but I feel like character is the most important thing. I wouldn’t care if a guy I was dating was short and poor. I’d care about his character, what he stands for, and if he’s willing to put in the effort to grow together ( emotionally, spiritually, financially,etc.)

🍓

Anonymous

OP 5d

I’m really sorry you’ve experienced that. I dealt with that for a while, it was hard to find any men who seemed kind and interested in me for something besides my body. I promise they are out there.

Anonymous

#5 5d

I wish I could move, but I can’t rn. I don’t date anymore but all the men I’m forced to be around due to work, classes, and other responsibilities are further instilling these beliefs. Seeing things online and in others lives hasn’t helped much either😵‍💫

Anonymous

OP 5d

Definitely only interact with positive videos to help counteract it then. And therapy may also help you deal with some of the trauma

Anonymous

#5 5d

Yeah, you’re right. I’m in therapy now, but at this point I might just have to get off social media. It’s literally everywhere at this point. I can’t even avoid it if I try:/

Anonymous

OP 5d

Yep because the algorithms are programmed to show you what you’re most likely to get upset about and engage with based on what you’ve reacted to before. Take a break from socials. I know the bad stuff stands out but good things are still there if you look just as hard!

Anonymous

#5 5d

That gives me hope. I feel like it’s so rare to find a guy like that and a guy who has friends that are also like that.

Anonymous

OP 5d

I think as you continue therapy and heal you’ll get better at seeing the small signs about what kind of men to avoid and which ones aren’t like them. You’ll have an easier time cultivating people what kind of people stay in your life in the process. At least that’s what happened with me!

Anonymous

#5 5d

I’ve been in therapy for 10 years… all it’s shown me is to avoid them all😭

Anonymous

OP 5d

May need to explore different types of therapy then or it’s just gonna take you longer to deal with some of your stuff

Anonymous

#5 5d

I have.

Anonymous

strawberry_hair 5d

idk why ur being downvoted ive never thought that either😭 maybe bc i havent been on social media much so it hasnt gotten a chance to warp my worldview in a negative way but i genuinely see both men & women as equals in the sense that neither r worse or better than the other. neither have more or less empathy. there r bad actors & horrible ppl on both sides & when it really comes down to it we're all just individuals w families, friends, lives, brains, hearts, thoughts, hopes, wishes, desires

Anonymous

#10 5d

I’m trying but I’m not seeing any 😭

Anonymous

OP 4d

Every time I took a long break from social media, I got much happier in general. I now use it sparingly, to find important events and occasionally respond to strangers online as I check on my request for rotting meat to bait flies and raise maggots.