Ask Women on Sidechat | so I want to cold approach this girl and I’d do so by complementing her then just asking if she’d want to exchange contact or insta but I want to do so in the most respectful way. Any advice? Also do girls get uncomfortable being approached by a mid guy?

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Ask Women 14h

so I want to cold approach this girl and I’d do so by complementing her then just asking if she’d want to exchange contact or insta but I want to do so in the most respectful way. Any advice? Also do girls get uncomfortable being approached by a mid guy?

Anonymous 14h

Just go over to her, don’t be too forward because that can come off as a little scary sometimes. But say something like “hey I think you are beautiful, could I have your number?”

Anonymous 14h

Personally I don’t give out my information to people I haven’t had a conversation with for safety reasons. But all women are different

Anonymous 11h

I think it’s odd to refer to yourself as “mid” personally. Attractiveness is very subjective. I’ve seen a guy that other girls thirsted over be gross af imo because of his personality. I’ve also crushed on someone a former bestie kindly referred to as “fugly”. By the same vein she thought her ex was hot af and I would’ve called him average looking based on pics alone.

Anonymous 8h

honestly different people get uncomfortable for different reasons i personally think the best way to be approached is for someone to come up and say "hey i think you are really pretty and want to get to know you romantically. i was wondering if you are interested in chatting right now or would you like me to give you my number, or if you would prefer to be left alone" ending with a smile if a good touch that is my preferred way but there's a chance not everyone feels the same way

Anonymous

#3 10h

That’s true but I think you could also objectively tell if someone is attractive or not even if you are or aren’t attracted to them. I feel like I’m objectively very mid and I think ppl typically don’t find me attractive but I can see ur point

Anonymous

OP 10h

I mean blonde, blue eyed, 6ft, baseball player is basically the stereotype of “objectively attractive”.

Anonymous

#3 10h

I still thought he was disgusting.

Anonymous

OP 10h

And so would tall, brunette and looking like Superman with brown eyes imo. But she still called him “fugly with a butt chin”. Again subjective. My ex who also looked like Clark Kent with blue-green eyes (ig I have a type) with a dad bod also thought he wasn’t attractive. Again subjective. Just because you’re not your type doesn’t mean you’re no one’s but be careful about attributing to looks what is actually down to how you approach, think about others/yourself, and how you represent yourself.

Anonymous

#3 10h

I don’t mind a guy who isn’t confident but a lot of women get turned off by it. But the specific wording of “mid” originated from certain men’s groups echo chambers that have specific beliefs about what is attractive or not and they’re not based in reality because there isn’t one “objective” attractive quality for anyone. I personally think green or hazel eyes are the most attractive, but I know at least one who thinks anything close to brown are the least attractive and nothing beats blue.

Anonymous

#3 10h

I see what ur saying I feel like it’s hard to accept bc of all the beliefs pushed on me 😭but u actually changed my views on this and I think you’re right about this I’ll try to change my mindset ty!

Anonymous

OP 9h

No probs! Stay out of echo chambers and maybe work on expanding your friend group with women you aren’t trying to get with!

Anonymous

#4 8h

It’s so true that people are different because while I absolutely love direct communication, this wouldn’t work on me personally because I don’t trust people immediately and it creeps me out when people immediately move to romantic interest upon meeting. Different people, different things work.

Anonymous

#3 7h

i wonder if a "i wanted to get to know you as friends and see if maybe you would be interested in going on a date later on" would be a better approach i really like knowing if the person is talking to me with eventual romantic possibility considered or if it's purely platonic at the moment

Anonymous

#4 7h

That might work. For me emotional intimacy comes before physical, partly because im a physically affectionate person naturally and physical always seems to move really fast when it starts so I like to *know* someone as a person way before I know them romantically. And if I like them as a person and am romantically interested I’m basically ready for official relationship immediately because my heart and body are really tied together.

Deleted 7h

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Anonymous 7h

i totally agree!! i want to know someone before i start dating them and im not good at casual i also get confused as to why someone is talking to me sometimes and im not sure if their only intention is friendship or if they think theres a chance they might want to get to know me to see if they are interested in me romantically

Anonymous

#4 7h

Right?! It’s so uncomfortable when someone’s like “k can we be romantic now?” I’m just like???? Could you have just walked up to anyone? You don’t know me why do you want me right now? It just feels like it’s all about checking a physical box and nothing about who I am as a person. Like yay I have boobs that you like, cool, now how do you know we’d actually vibe?

Anonymous

#3 7h

how are we meant to date or get physical right away like man i don't know who you are and you don't know me i could be the most batshıt crazy person ever how are you certain it's time to be with me 😭😭 looks are a perfectly fine place to start out but it ain't the whole picture

Anonymous

#4 6h

Oh I am batshit (in hopefully the best way for the right person) but come up to me cold and hit on me and you might get an earful of how easy it is to find some of the worlds deadliest poisons among common houseplants, asked if you like to be pegged, or told your bud light/corona/coors is basic bitch beer.

Anonymous

#4 6h

Approach with respect and you get respect. Approach unhinged and I’ll show you unhinged.