Anonymous #1 1d

What?

1

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

Like yes but also I’ve had several girls tell me this and I’m still single so I don’t get what I’m doing wrong. Like are they just being nice or genuinely mean it? Idk. I guess it’s also the thought of am I really that perfect?

11

Anonymous OP 1d

No they probably mean it. Just because you haven’t found a girlfriend doesn’t mean what they’ve said wasn’t wrong. Doesn’t mean you’re “perfect” but could mean you’ve got a lot of good qualities.

5

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

Okay. I just feels like I could still be doing something wrong. I’m also at a point right now where I just want something fun and short term and that’s probably most of it. Do you have any suggestions on where to find girls that want something similar?

8

Anonymous OP 1d

Ngl if you’re looking for something short term of course you haven’t found a girlfriend. Most people who want something short term don’t even label themselves “boyfriend” or “girlfriend”. Honestly I have no idea where you’d find that. Clubs and dating apps would be my best bet. But it makes perfect sense now.

5

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

Alright. Thank you for the advice! I just want to find something. I had been talking to a girl that I wanted long term with this summer and it didn’t go well.

9

Anonymous OP 1d

Long term doesn’t work with everyone, but if you want it that doesn’t mean you should give up on it.

5

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

I know! It was also just a complete shit show where I got used for the entire summer so I’m trying to get better. Just want a girl.

12

Anonymous OP 1d

My ex and I broke up- he was the first boyfriend I had in quite a while. We only dated 3 months because he didn’t communicate with me. Then he broke up with me on text 🙄. So I completely understand how you feel. But your existence shouldn’t revolve around getting a girl.

4

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

I’m sorry to hear that. It doesn’t. Just would be nice to have a girl interested in me, you know?

11

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

Bro you are not understanding shit. You said you had a boyfriend and then you had OTHER boyfriends prior to your ex. The guy you’re talking to, let’s be honest here, is desperate for literally ANYTHING (long term OR short term) because he’s had no success. You’re trying to “relate” by bringing up your sexual experiences, but it’s really just highlighting how poorly you can relate to their circumstances.

-2

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

And no, I don’t think that it’s kind or respectful at all to tell a man “you’re perfect so I don’t know why you’re single.” It is a backhanded compliment. It is essentially saying that it’s “weird” that he’s single. That is NOT kind. If that person was so serious about him being “perfect,” they would date him. But obviously they are just flattering him and are not serious about how “perfect” he is which makes it even more disingenuous and insulting.

-2

Anonymous #3 1d

I didn’t bring up any sexual experiences. I related to struggling with romance like he mentioned he did over the summer. The fact is, being desperate for someone is not good. Everyone relates in different ways. Besides OP seemed to appreciate my advice so I don’t know why you’re being so aggressive about it.

4

Anonymous #3 1d

Well I’m not saying I’ve ever said that to a man. I’ve also had people say that about me. People don’t mean it in a negative light. Truly, I think you’re making a mountain out of a molehill. It’s common to say and that doesn’t mean it has to have bad intentions.

1

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

I’m being “aggressive” because you can not relate. You have obviously had multiple sexual partners while OP has had zero, and you have no trouble finding partners, both short term and long term. So don’t tell OP that “long term doesn’t work for everyone but you shouldn’t give up on it.” It’s obvious that you are incapable of *reading between the lines*. You should have asked yourself WHY the OP said “long term but now I’m fine with short term.” Because the guy has no experience.

-2

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

People saying it to you means nothing. You’ve already had your fair share of sexual partners for it to not affect you. If you had zero all your life and are unable to have either short term or long term relationships, that sentence is far more insulting and disrespectful. “Why are you single” is a ridiculous thing to ask someone who has never NOT been single.

-2

Anonymous #3 1d

Once again, I am not talking about sexual partners. I keep any information about that strictly to myself. You did not read my post either. This was the first guy I had dated in years. You do understand that correct? Like I was in high school last time I was with someone other than my most recent ex. Just because I dated previously does not mean I cannot give good advice, especially as dating as an adult.

1

Anonymous #3 1d

Okay I don’t think you are actually reading what I am saying. I won’t engage with your anymore because you clearly are not understanding a word that I am saying. I really hope you deal with this bitterness and don’t just put it on random people.

1

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

“I related to struggling with romance” You do NOT struggle with romance, no matter how much you’d like to pretend, for the sake of speaking to OP, that you do. Tell us: how many boyfriends have you had? How many sexual partners have you had? OP has had zero for both. You are the wrong person to pretend to be “relating to” OP. You are experiences do not match up in any way shape or form.

-2

Anonymous #3 1d

Did OP say they’d never had any sexual experience or did you just interpret it that way? You seem to be under the (false) impression that women cannot struggle with dating. I promise you, we very much can. I tried dating apps and many other things before realizing dating was just not going to happen for me while I was in college.

5

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

Don’t engage anymore. And make sure to no longer *pretend* to relate to OP, as you have insultingly and rudely done. Your experiences do not align AT ALL, so quit pretending that you can relate. Good on you for quitting talking to OP. You’ve contributed absolutely nothing.

-2

Anonymous #3 1d

I’m actually dming OP because I didn’t want them to have to engage with you. We’re having a conversation and I double checked that my actions were not rude. You came into a space to berate me, without giving any advice yourself. How can you feel justified after that?

1

Anonymous #3 1d

Please just shut up dude

7

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

“I dated several guys in high school and had sex with other guys while OP is a late college student with zero experience with any woman whatsoever, surely I can tell OP that we are similar and relate to them about our struggles.” You have absolutely ZERO ability to relate. Because you have had relationship experience from when you were incredibly young, while OP is in late adulthood and has never even had a partner in ANY capacity. Your “romantic struggles” are not similar. Quit lying to OP.

-2

Anonymous #3 1d

Dude do you just have an obsession about thinking about me having sex? Because I never once mentioned it. If you’re attracted to my words just say so and dm me like a normal person instead of bothering OP.

1

Anonymous strawberry_hair 1d

You aren’t able to read if you can’t understand why I mentioned the asymmetry between your experiences with past partners and OP’s experiences. You pretend that you have “romantic struggles,” but you do not have anywhere near the inexperience that OP does, so you are being completely deceptive and insincere. And it’s also obvious that you discouraged OP from pursing short term relationships without understanding WHY (by reading between the lines) OP would be drawn to this (no experience)

-1

Anonymous #3 1d

Dude. Seriously stop. You’re not getting it. Also I’ve been in relationships before, just asked one question.

5

Anonymous OP 1d

Okay, that was not clear. I’ll stop engaging then.

-1

Anonymous #1 1d

Wait me too

1

Anonymous OP 20h

This is also 3 btw. He was blocked for me lol

1

Anonymous #5 20h

Wtf. Dude is just butt hurt on something. Thank you.

5

Anonymous #3 16h

Dude actually wtf is your issue

3