Ask Men on Sidechat | Would you rather a breakup come as a devastating shock when you think everything is fine or have your partner pull away over the course of a week so you expect it when they tell you?

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Ask Men 16h

Would you rather a breakup come as a devastating shock when you think everything is fine or have your partner pull away over the course of a week so you expect it when they tell you?

Anonymous 16h

Fantastic question. Personally I would rather have the bandaid ripped off but as someone who broke up with their gf that way she said it really hurt and wished I had done it more gradually. Which is tough because how do I gradually pull away without being a dick? So sorry to say I have no good answers but I’m curious what other people have to say about it

Anonymous 12h

i want the latter option so i have time to adjust and get closure

Anonymous 9h

I feel like both are kind of a dick move, but it depends what the reason for the breakup actually is. If it’s just lost feelings, tear off the bandaid, but if it’s a problem that can be resolved, talk about it, make it clear you’d want to break up without it getting fixed. Try not yo make it like a “fix it or else” conversation though, just lay out that you’re not right for each other if the thing isn’t something you can work on together

Anonymous

#3 9h

I've come to realize that we're incompatible long term (different timelines) and I’m still not in love after six months even though I want to be.This isn't something we can fix

Anonymous

OP 7h

yeah then just explain that to him