Ask Men on Sidechat | my bf told me he doesn’t like it when i wear revealing clothes. or tights ones. i like wearing leggings and stuff. can someone pls advise

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Ask Men 16h

my bf told me he doesn’t like it when i wear revealing clothes. or tights ones. i like wearing leggings and stuff. can someone pls advise

Anonymous 16h

He doesnt have to like it but he sure as hell should not be making you feel bad or forbid you from expressing yourself however you wish

Anonymous 15h

He’s telling you his preference for the relationship. Doesn’t seem forced, just simply stating it. Do whatever you want to do, he will mentally note the results. I’m sure he’s fine with some kind of exception, a conversation for yall

Anonymous 8h

Youre his girlfriend. Whos capable of making her own decisions. Do not ever settle for insecurity at the hands of someone who tries to control what youre wearing because theyre too afraid to say that they don’t want to lose you. Ask him why he feels that way. Distance his reason from him. I can understand the competition aspect of it, but if hes secure in knowing that you have his heart, then I personally wouldn’t care what you wear unless it’s over the top self-disrespectful.

Anonymous 10h

Personally, I think this is really controlling on his part. It shouldn't be up to your partner what you wear, you should be able to wear what you enjoy and feel comfortable in.

Anonymous 9h

Relationships are built on mutual respect, he’s gotta respect what u decide to do and u should respect what he feels comfortable with, neither can force what they want on the other yall j gotta figure it out, it takes a lot of maturity and is very difficult to figure out

Anonymous

#1 16h

i think he doesn’t like it. he told me it causes unnecessary attention

Anonymous

OP 14h

And he should absolutely not be directing that at you. A lot of guys will see the risks that women face and feel a desire to protect and a feeling of guilt by association/complacence that they end up directing at the women in their lives they are worried about. Which isnt okay nor does it make it not hurt even if it comes from a place of well intentions (your safety)

Anonymous

OP 8h

My question for him would be why is that a bad thing? If it’s about male attention, then it’s either a trust issue he has with you or a doubt in himself to stand up for you. Safety is one thing but forbidding (or suggesting it be forbidden) someone from wearing clothes they have always worn and enjoyed is very controlling and imo is a red flag for unresolved insecurity.