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AITA 3w
AITA for telling my fiancé if he wanted a wedding then he would be in charge of planning all of it? I don’t want a wedding, I’d prefer to just elope and have like a celebratory dinner with fam afterwards. He wants a full blown traditional wedding
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6
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Anonymous 3w

Maybe compromise and do a small wedding with just close friends and family

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Anonymous 3w

Which to me is my worst nightmare, I hate being the center of attention, I have having everyone look at me and I don’t enjoy being lovey dovey in front of people. Not only that but from what of my married friends and family told me wedding planning sounds absolutely miserable and I want no part in it. My fiance wants the very stereotypically wedding so I told him if he wanted one he can plan it and just let me know what’s going on. He’s now deeply upset because he wanted us to plan this together

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Anonymous 3w

I understand both sides, although I think there should be a compromise as you will be a unit and sometimes people need to be a little more flexible when accommodating plans for two people. I'm not stating which side should have the compromise because that's up to you both to decide, not strangers to validate you and go against him when we don't know the relationship

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 3w

Did not intend for it to come across as wanting strangers to pick one side or the other just genuinely wanted an outsider point of view. I agree that there should be compromise but to me the elopement and then celebration dinner with family was the compromise. He still very much wants a big trad wedding and I’m still trying to talk with him to both cut down on the size and get a wedding planner to help him but he is very adamant that WE have to plan a big wedding.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 2w

I feel the exact same way, planning and being in a wedding would be my own personal hell. Did the two of you discuss any of this before he proposed? I mention my feelings pretty early on to partners, and having said that, if they still want a massive wedding, I would respond just like you did.

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Anonymous replying to -> #3 2w

Maybe ask why it’s so important to him. Once you know that, there might be other ways to compromise that work better for both of you

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