AITA on Sidechat | AITA: My (23F) boyfriend (20M) is insecure about my partner (27M) 27M: S 20M: G MORE IN COMMENT!!

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AITA 3w

AITA: My (23F) boyfriend (20M) is insecure about my partner (27M) 27M: S 20M: G MORE IN COMMENT!!

Anonymous 3w

Does G know the extent of your relationship with S? If yes, then NTA, otherwise maybe. Either way I don't like you

Anonymous 3w

Ew.

Anonymous 2w

I don’t think yta but like #1 is saying you need to have a convo with G abt what he wants in the relationship and what you want. It’s hard to be with someone who’s insecure and obvi want to fix that and considering his monogamous there may be some conflict just in how you both are viewing the relationship or if he thinks you like one more than the other (idk much abt poly relationships j feels like sm that might happen idk)

Anonymous 3w

I’ve been seeing S for about three years now and knew him two years prior to that. He helped me out of an abusive relationship by being a supportive light in my life. Me and him are poly. Started dating G a bit over a year ago, and he is monogamous. HE KNEW ABOUT S GOING INTO THE RELATIONSHIP!! G has now started staying with me full-time, and I visit S 1-4 times a month. On the times I do get to see S, G will text me a lot asking what we’re doing and things like that.

Anonymous 2w

Poly people are so weird

Anonymous 2w

Lmao you’re weird ash. YTA

🚰

Anonymous 2w

Polyamory is asking for an Open relationship. I never understood the concept of one because it’s essentially asking “Hey, can we cheat on each other but still love each other one on one” with consent. That doesn’t make sense. If you don’t want to be the person you ask to have a polyamorous relationship with, just don’t be with them. I just fail to understand the concept, no hate to anyone.

Anonymous 2w

nta, I think you should have a sit-down conversation with G about what he wants long-term and why he got with you knowing you're poly and have another partner while being monogamous himself. I don't know you or S or G, but G lowkey sounds kinda manipulative and like he might be trying to change who you are. then again, I hate men and always see the worst in them, so take that with a grain of salt

Anonymous

OP 3w

Today, G called me THREE TIMES during my night with S, saying he was just worried, but didn’t bother to text me first (he knows I hate calling without warning). I feel frustrated and I came home to him being grumpy again.

Anonymous

#1 2w

Ew what? Polyamory with consent from all parties?

-1

Anonymous

OP 2w

I think thats what they were ew-ing, yes

Anonymous

#2 2w

I forget sometimes that a lot of ppl don’t know about the existence of polyamory and immediately assume cheating

-1

Anonymous

#2 2w

Everyone knew all information before going into this, yes. Could you elaborate on not liking me and if it’s personal preference or if I’m being a shitty person

Anonymous

OP 2w

no we know what polyamory is. We just don't like it

Anonymous

#2 2w

Can I ask why? What do people have against more love in people’s lives? I understand not wanting it for yourself, but what’s wrong with consenting parties being in love

Anonymous

OP 2w

I don't really like polyamory. Don't have a great reason, just opposed. You also don't sound like a great person if I'm being honest. The whole thing about being grumpy because of your boyfriend's discomfort kinda just paints you in a bad light in my eyes. I have some issues stemming from past relationships, so I kinda just dislike anyone who gets upset over their partner's boundaries. I don't know all the details and I don't know you so maybe I'm wrong, but thats the vibe I got.

Anonymous

OP 2w

also the part about not liking you in my original comment was mostly a joke

Anonymous

#2 2w

Ohhh okay (I’m really bad at tone, especially online, so I’m sorry for misinterpreting!)

Anonymous

#2 2w

I can entirely see that. I was frustrated when I made the post but G hasn’t set any boundaries in regards to me seeing S. I know he isn’t the happiest about it but maybe a more in-depth conversation is in order, even if it will be uncomfortable. You’re right, I was selfish last night, and I’m grateful that you called me out on it so I have a chance to make better choices moving forward.

Anonymous

OP 2w

Because it’s nasty and seems cool in the short term but is instead ruining you for the long term. Just don’t be in a relationship at all, you are embarrassing to the human race. You make me sick. Yucky! 🤢

-2

Anonymous

#1 2w

you realize there's this really cool thing called ✨scrolling✨ right?

Anonymous

#4 2w

Facts bro 😭

Anonymous

#5 2w

some would saay it's weird as hell to insult someone bc you don't understand something about them

Anonymous

OP 2w

Good on you for being able yo reflect and learn from your actions, many people can't take accountability like that. A conversation on boundaries is definitely a good idea, especially if you want this relationship to last

Anonymous

#3 2w

You realize there is thing called an opinion right… she can take it how she pleases. I think she is gross.

-2

Anonymous

#1 2w

it's not always necessary to voice your opinion, especially when that involves putting others down

Anonymous

#3 2w

Stop normalizing polyamory

Anonymous

#4 2w

stop being hateful just bc it's not for you. what other people do is none of your business

-1

Anonymous

#3 2w

Hmmmm it’s almost like they posted about it online. Your comment is invalid. Also, calling them weird isn’t being hateful when they are asking for opinion.

Anonymous

#5 2w

they're asking for an opinion about a specific situation, not who they are. and irregardless of if it's online or not you should be capable of having basic manners

Anonymous

#3 2w

And again, my opinion on the specific situation is that they are weird. Nothing about it is hateful. People can hear that and be okay, grow up.

Anonymous

#5 2w

would like to point out that I called #4 hateful, not you. I called you weird for insulting op. and yeah, people can hear that and be okay, or they could be having a shit time of their life and your unnecessary insult could be the straw that breaks the camel's back. it's not that hard to keep harsh words to yourself, especially when you can see a bunch of other people were already being rude to op

Anonymous

#3 2w

Womp womp. Just did. Cry about it.

-2

Anonymous

#3 2w

You are yuckyyyy

Anonymous

#1 2w

alr mr. temper tantrum, no need to get all fussy just bc some people have more game than you

-1

Anonymous

#3 2w

Some of us are just in normal things with one person and have respect that is mutual and don’t need to be yucky. Not a game thing, a human thing. Go look in a mirror

-1

Anonymous

#1 2w

poly relationships can have mutual respect as well, and is actually also in humanity's history so it is quite human. to be such an asshole just because someone has different preferences from you is super weird, why do you care so much about what someone else does?

Anonymous

#1 2w

You sound like a 10 year old

Anonymous

#3 2w

You need to be bullied just as bad as OP does tbh.

-1

Anonymous

#4 2w

imagine hating that someone else is happier in a different kind of relationship than you are so much that you feel the need to bully them. go touch grass bro