Sidechat logo
Download TikTok Instagram X
Sidechat icon
Join communities on Sidechat Download
Ask Anything icon
Ask Anything 2w
Why is waiting until marriage made out to be a bad thing/gets a lot of shame now?
comment

25
upvote 39 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

Bc we live in a hyper sexualized world.., but waiting till marriage ain’t bad at all

upvote 26 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

because it's a leftover of a completely christianity-dominated culture with no basis in reality

upvote 20 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

Because you should always test drive a car before buying

upvote 14 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

Going into marriage with a decent chance you are not sexually compatible isn’t smart. You are welcome to do so but it’s not a good idea

upvote 14 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

And I mean in general not just religious reasons^

upvote 11 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

Because most just want fun. Not knowing it’s best to wait

upvote 7 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

It gets shamed cause stupid ass people are doing the shit backwards. Hook up on no bc get pregnant. Then maybe try to have a piece of a relationship because of the kid. That shit isn't ok to do. And then the people that are married either cheat or open the marriage. Knowing they just need to get divorced. Or they just pathetically stay together for the kids. Kids ain't stupid. They know they need to get divorced. Marriage isn't a bad thing

upvote 6 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

Most of the married people are doing things to make it a mockery

upvote 5 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

Since nobody else is giving a good answer: Because purity culture is pedophile culture. (And now that you have the words, you can take to Google to read all about it!)

upvote 1 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

I think my favorite thing here is how saying I want a virgin 21-22 y/o is “pedophilia” BUT. Saying I’m totally in support of kids fucking each other before maturity and that it’s actually better is not????? Make this make sense. And if you say “but a 14 year old fucking a 14 year old is fine” I will slap your mouth because lord help us.

upvote 1 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 2w

How about this. Sex isn’t about getting as much pleasure as possible. It’s about sharing something special with someone. The more people you have sex with the less special it is. If your marriage is fully dependent on sex then you’ve got bigger problems there. I think our culture is fucked. This life is so beautiful and so short, and it’s being perverted and twisted into a lustful game.

upvote -1 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #4 2w

yes bc they never actually teach them about sex they just shame it den u get ppl not knowing life saving precautions

upvote 18 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #4 2w

Oh my god yall manage to make a mountain out of EVERY molehill

upvote 6 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #6 2w

Either read about it or fuck off you undereducated creep

upvote 5 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #6 2w

i mean there’s so many nuances to the conversation like let’s began at the fact it’s only targeted at women why is that

upvote 18 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #4 2w

So let me get this straight not having sex equals pedophilia???

upvote 7 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #9 2w

no, but the culture of men wanting immature and inexperienced women is adjacent to pedophilia.

upvote 17 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #4 2w

Girl im a grown ass woman i know plenty im saying this has almost nothing to do with what OP was asking. OP was referring to the prevalence of hookup culture and cultural norms pushing sex at earlier ages, not the history of pedophilia and the church lmao.

upvote 2 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #5 2w

I mean thats a given with any social issue lmao. Anything a woman does is wrong. She waits? Shes a prude. She doesnt? Shes a sleaze. Shes abrasive? Shes a b****. Shes really nice? Shes fake. Yes there is absolutely a history of puritanism and pedophilia, especially when it targets younger women. My point was that OPs question was about a different topic. Its the push for people to hurry and have sex ASAP to be “mature” and prove themselves, when its entirely a personal choice.

upvote 12 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #6 2w

Women are certainly not being pushed into having sex early. We were told since children to preserve our innocence until marriage while our male counterparts were praised for losing their virginity early. Only one individual is being held accountable to maintain the sex after marriage ideology. So, the question can only be geared towards women and as we see in the media women are shamed for being sexual beings meaning sex after marriage is not shamed at all or as much as premarital sex.

upvote 0 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #5 2w

Girl what are you talking about.. girls are absolutely pushed into sex early what planet are you on. Unless youre in like utah this is not the situation for most women

upvote 5 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #6 2w

Ykw two things can be true at the same time some experience the pressure to have sex others experience the pressure to persevere their innocence which is all based on environment which honestly doesn’t make it a personal choice more of a fearful choice on either side.

upvote 1 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #5 2w

in reality tho you’re likely to be shamed for having sex before marriage especially if you have a child.

upvote 1 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #12 2w

Sex can be either getting as much pleasure as possible OR sharing something special with someone. It depends on the person, context and situation.

upvote 9 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #3 2w

Oh I’m well aware it “can” be that way. I’m not saying it can’t. I’m saying it shouldn’t. And there genuinely isn’t a single thing you could tell me that would make me believe having sex younger and being more experienced going into marriage is better at all.

upvote -3 downvote