Anonymous flockfucker 1d

just about 4 dates before she went off abroad over the summer - i ended up visiting her not knowing all that obv - but i know it now… what do u think - we didn’t talk about being exclusive but i feel like morally, how could u do that

1

Anonymous OP 1d

why have you stayed? this is an issue for me that would cause genuine concerns regarding becoming official

17

Anonymous #2 1d

right i know, she’s just so great now though and TECHNICALLY it’s not cheating. but character wise - who does that - we had sex the first night we met too so i’m feeling like an idiot despite the success in the relationship currently

3

Anonymous #1 1d

i keep telling myself it wasn’t technically cheating and she is really amazing… but i feel like a fucking cuck at the same time idk - is a great relationship worth breaking off bc of this?

8

Anonymous OP 1d

in what ways is the relationship good?

1

Anonymous OP 1d

and how old are you guys? if you don’t mind

1

Anonymous #1 1d

it’s the classic - pretty, smart, funny - then adventurous on top of it. she treats me well too and is very generous soul

0

Anonymous OP 1d

I feel like relationships like this teach you very meaningful life lessons and maybe that’s all part of the plan and meaning of your guys relationship. if this has been heavy on your mind, it will continue to be, nothing anyone says on here will ever silence those thoughts. it’s up to you if you want to future with her after what she has done. me personally, I would not.

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Anonymous #1 1d

now is ur concern stemming from her ability to be loyal pre dating or is it her lack of integrity and having sex with so many ppl despite me still being in the picture. bc there is no scare of her being unfaithful - my pride is hurt tho

2

Anonymous #1 1d

fuck i know. it’s definitely a me problem on whether i can handle the baggage or not. i just needed to hear if i’m crazy or not for throwing a good thing away for this reason - thanks for ur response - im feeling a bit better

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Anonymous #1 1d

both 22

1

Anonymous OP 1d

lack of integrity. and don’t forget it is not bizarre to expect someone even in the talking stage to be loyal and have some sort of respect for you. that shows u she wasn’t taking you seriously, doesn’t take talking stages seriously (which is insane since you’re literally dating), or just never cared to let you know. and ima just say it as a girl sex with 3 different guys is kinda crazy.

5

Anonymous #1 1d

would you not carry on bc of your pride though (self respect of sorts) or bc of her potential lack of loyalty? the distinction is important bc id be leaving for my prides sake (basically) (she’s definitely loyal so i don’t worry about that)

1

Anonymous OP 1d

it’s definitely not insane. anything that makes you worry or uncomfortable is a REAL concern no matter how little ur partner may try to make it seem

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Anonymous OP 1d

ending something based off pride and ego may cause you too later regret things down the road. u have to think with your heart and not your mind. if your heart is telling you, she’s loyal and you truly love her and appreciate her, but your mind is telling you something else you always need to follow your heart.

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Anonymous #1 1d

three people is insane work i know… you’ve clocked this well - my mind says leave and my heart says stay. i guess if my mind doesn’t eventually catch up to my heart though i better end it huh

5

Anonymous OP 1d

yes exactly

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Anonymous OP 1d

if u feel comfortable im always down to chat (ik you have a gf so ofc i wanna be respectful) but i went through the exact same thing with my ex bf and eventually had to leave :/

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Anonymous #4 1d

yeah… i understand your point

4

Anonymous OP 1d

Do you want a relationship full of technically’s and subtle disrespect?

6

Anonymous OP 1d

You wanna look into her eyes on your wedding day and know she was getting cracked behind your back when you first met her? Brother I’m saying this to help you out, save yourself the heartbreak and go find someone with a moral compass and dignity. It’s a random app so ill never know who you are, but if i were you personally, I would immediately end it.

2

Anonymous OP 23h

Yeah. I think if you were traveling ABROAD to visit her y’all were deep enough for this to be concerning. I’d talk to her about it and tell her how you feel. It will be a hard conversation, and try to come at it in a non accusatory way

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Anonymous #9 18h

Very well said Because if the relationship is going great then she must be really cool, should have bagged her sooner.

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Anonymous #4 16h

I disagree, since the relationship wasn’t exclusive or official yet, it’s not wrong of her to have talked to other people. You’re speaking about this girl very disrespectfully. If she’s given OP no reason to worry since their relationship has started, then it’s not worth breaking up over now. As long as shes been respectful then it does just seem like overthinking imo

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Anonymous #12 15h

I see what you mean, but I think the girl should have 100% communicated before seeing other people. Personally, I always let the person I’m seeing know that I rather want to be exclusive, or am currently talking to other people as well. She’s not a ho or anything like that, but she should ave talked about it

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Anonymous #8 15h

But it doesn’t work like that You said “Personally, I always…” thats YOU And if it really is you then why didn’t YOU ask her to be exclusive? She’s chilling, I’m afraid your ego might just be bruised, dont let it ruin your great relationship.

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Anonymous #8 13h

I agree, communication is very important. however I think this is a fault that falls on both parties, she didn’t clarify that she was seeing other people and he didn’t clarify that he wanted to just be exclusive. Either way, I don’t think this is a fault that should be held against her, especially after an entire year of officially dating, in which it sounds like A. This hasn’t been addressed, and B. There haven’t been other issues regarding loyalty

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Anonymous #12 13h

Well said

1

Anonymous #12 13h

Yeah I agree with this and I don’t at all think it’s break up worthy. It was a miscommunication and a fault in both parties. He should have said something, and she should have said something by as well. Again, I personally would communicate that I’m talking to other people, but he also shouldn’t have just assumed that she was exclusive to begin with. He should have asked, and she should have said something. Most people aren’t exclusive when they first meet people, especially if it was on an app

3