Anonymous #1 4w

girl it’s worse

21

Anonymous #4 4w

?

1

Anonymous OP 4w

Urmmmm I’m not one to talk on someone’s relationship you know your dynamic and the ins and out BUT I will say if you’re in a situation where your feelings and thoughts about smth are not being respected and valued you need to either remove yourself from that situation or find a way to make sure going forward you are comfortable moving forward

61

Anonymous #1 4w

This isn’t smth you just sweep under the rug , advocate for yourself and put your foot down

38

Anonymous #7 4w

cuz he denied it hurting me?

11

Anonymous OP 4w

and got instantly defensive about it without listening to you at ALL

44

Anonymous #5 4w

Shit I didn’t think of it like that. I just thought he wanted to talk face to face to intimidate her and strongarm her into a decision

31

Anonymous OP 4w

Plus the way he speaks to you. And fyi, chocking is one of the most dangerous things that you can do in the bedroom. It’s like a soft taboo in the BDSM community

29

Anonymous #13 4w

Giant glowing red flag. Sex is fun and feels good but for a lot of people it’s also deeply vulnerable and he has NO RESPECT for that and for you. Banish the bitch!!

11

Yes and it's people( men and women bc shocker there's evil everywhere ) deciding to allow such behaviors that are reinforcing and continuing this instead of immediately ending it, and becoming to “soft”, we have become like brainwashed as a WHOLE to allow excuses for certain behavior simply because we like the person.

10

Anonymous #14 4w

I can understand this but if I came to you saying smth you were doing made me uncomfortable would your immediate response be but you’re not doing this for me . You can be frustrated about smth yeah but his response is quite off putting but that’s why I also said , she knows her relationship and the ins and out we’re just viewers of a small snippet , we can only say so much without knowing the whole situation

10

Anonymous #14 4w

right like i said i don’t mind him sayin he needs more oral or stuff but it’s the fact he brought it up immediately

10

Anonymous #5 4w

You’re incoherent and you have very little context here. My original comment still stands. You don’t get to be the social police and prescribe your own standards for other people to follow.

-16

Anonymous #6 4w

it's very obvious that you see yourself in the guy she's texting, and it should really make you think about things that hundreds of people reading this unanimously agree that he's a psycho. you don't have to be this way.

25

Anonymous #7 4w

No literally. Theres zero advice to be given here except dump him immediately and there’s no “but”s about it

8

Anonymous #14 4w

Then he needs to ask for that kindly instead of “well if you’re not doing that then you have to let me harm you even though you don’t like it”

7

Anonymous #7 4w

Not at all. I don’t agree with the Tea app girls. It’s a stupid concept and is reflected by this person.

-10

Anonymous #6 4w

No one brought up the tea app. We're looking at the actual texts. There is no ambiguity here. You are being vocally defensive of a guy who everyone else in this thread can see is behaving extremely badly. Why is that?

14

Anonymous #7 4w

No I’m not. I’m “vocally” disagreeing with the idea that there should be a repository of bad behavior from people. Do you need to reread the original comment in this comment chain? Why else would #5 want it documented?

-7

Anonymous #6 4w

Are you so brainrotted that the concept of having evidence only makes you think of an app? If OP didn't have these screenshots, assholes like you would be claiming she was exaggerating or making the whole situation up.

6

Anonymous #16 4w

like if he just feels like he can't get off without choking his partner that's one thing, and it means yall aren't really compatible, but he's trying to pressure you into it and that's a horse of a different color. consent is always paramount but ESPECIALLY with things like choking and hitting. if something involves injury he should not be trying to push at all and he really really needs to respect your no.

14

Anonymous #16 4w

I completely agree with you but I would just add... if he genuinely can't get off without his hands around his partner's throat, I think that's concerning even if everyone was on board with it

10

Anonymous #7 4w

Are you so brainrotted that you think OP is in danger? I always ask Yik Yak what they think about my relationship before going to the police 🤣 This is the typical relationship thread you see when you log in on here. You’re not being virtuous or saving anyone. You’re contributing to a karma farm.

-8

Anonymous #16 4w

non-consensual choking especially (or strangulation, which is the technical term, you're right to refer to it as him strangling you) is one of the highest indicators for future intimate partner violence. and it is EXTREMELY easy to hurt someone by choking them just a bit too hard or too long. he is putting your emotional and physical health in danger and this is genuinely concerning. you are right to be concerned. stand your ground.

7

Anonymous #7 4w

that's true yeah and it definitely would be an issue, but imo at least it would be much less concerning than him pressuring her

7

Anonymous #16 4w

agreed

6

Anonymous #16 4w

anyway op i'm sorry for writing you an essay but this is important and i just wanted to make it clear that a) he is 100% in the wrong here and b) this is really concerning behavior from him

6

Anonymous #6 4w

lol okay buddy. you can unpause your andrew tate video now

11

Anonymous #7 4w

Got me there girly Have a good night

-4

Anonymous #14 4w

guys i feel like we did not see that i literally said it’s not okay to react this way 😭😭 i meant him??? all i was saying is what it looked like he’s thinking, based off of this one screenshot and i also said that if he can’t respect OP being uncomfortable that she said leave..im so confused we were downvoting like im some pos 😭 i never once said he was in the right or should’ve acted this way. just observing this one screenshot. he certainly should’ve approached the situation differently

1

Anonymous #17 4w

😂😂😂😂

0

Anonymous #14 4w

hope OP does what is best for her ❤️ shouldn’t have to feel bad about what you don’t feel okay with doing

1

Anonymous #17 4w

Personally I would not be with someone who doesn’t participate during sex because I think it’s selfish and I’m a woman I expect effort also

0

Anonymous #14 4w

Agree

1

Anonymous #17 4w

ur missing the point that even if he had any complaints he could have brought it up any other time rather than when i say im uncomfortable

1

Anonymous OP 4w

Yeah he felt like he’s been compromising his sex life this whole time and what you did was the last straw for him. Sounds like you need to find a guy who lets you relax while he does all the work which is preference

-1

Anonymous #6 4w

Yea except for when people put their personal business on the internet like this. Get a life.

1

Anonymous #18 4w

bro i just wanted advice

17

Anonymous OP 4w

I think you need to find a guy who does stuff for you and doesn’t expect you to do things in return. Some men like to do that

8

Anonymous OP 4w

If you’re the person who posted this I am not shamming you. I was replying to a comment criticizing someone else’s advice saying they’re the “social police” meanwhile the poster wanted advice.

5

Anonymous #17 4w

i don’t want that tho.. ur missing the point completely

1

Anonymous OP 4w

You said you “don’t know how to feel” on ask anything??

4

Anonymous #17 4w

i normally would if he asked, i’ve done both things he talked about. the reason i’m upset is because he completely invalidated how i felt and attacked me instead of bringing it up at any other time.

1

Anonymous #17 4w

girl why have u commented this like 5 times when ive said i dont want that, and i actually do the things hes talking about and its about the fact that he brought it up now

7

Anonymous #18 4w

i’m referring to #17

1

Anonymous OP 4w

Cause if I was on his end I’d be like my partner is sexually selfish. You need to leave him he isn’t smart enough to realize he can’t change you. Men like this can be dangerous because they try and change something they canf

1

Anonymous #17 4w

You obviously aren’t meeting his needs even if you think you are I think you aren’t the person for him and he’s lying to himself saying you are

0

Anonymous OP 4w

No I’m not saying he’s in the right at all. I more was just saying that the person in this thread who was saying people were incoherent was rude and needs to stop acting like this wasn’t posted and asking for the public opinion. On the situation I would stay with a man like that. If he can invalidate you in the way it’s just going to continue and worsen.

1

Anonymous #18 4w

WOULDNT STAY***

1

Anonymous OP 4w

Leave him not sexually compatible is bottom line

0

Anonymous #17 4w

Nah I disagree. I think if you live someone you make sacrifices. You’re never going to be a 100% compatible with someone that’s a pipe dream. You have to choose to do things you don’t want and deal with someone else’s problems and preferences in a relationship and to me it seems she’s having to make all the sacrifices of doing things she doesn’t want to and he isn’t willing to just validate that she’s uncomfortable with the choking.

1

Anonymous #19 4w

i really appreciate a guys perspective. do you mean like you wouldn’t talk to her like this?

4

Anonymous #20 3w

I would put money on him thinking being gay is a choice.

3

Anonymous #20 3w

If he’s like that he could also thinks girls cheating is different than guys cheating because girls are the “seductive ones”

1

Anonymous #14 3w

“Taking away” you’re disgusting. Nobody is entitled to anyone else’s body for ANY fucking purpose. You cannot “withhold” what does not belong to someone else.

13

Anonymous #23 3w

Alaye

1

Anonymous #24 3w

i mean me and my partner love to get a little violent 😭 and we still feel very connected to each other during and after so definitely a sexual compatibility thing there.

1

Anonymous #8 3w

I’m not saying everyone needs to be lights off eyes closed by any means. Yall do you but, note, the more you add to the act, the less you’ll notice in the moment. Deaden some nerves and the sensation in one place will distract you from others. Be cautious and remember to stretch/hydrate 👍

1