Ask Anything on Sidechat | I don’t mean this generally as I know I’ve just encountered some bad apples (I think so at least) but why are women so rude to male rape victims? I am a male rape victim and the shit I’ve heard said to me has utterly destroyed my self-confidence.

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Ask Anything 18h

I don’t mean this generally as I know I’ve just encountered some bad apples (I think so at least) but why are women so rude to male rape victims? I am a male rape victim and the shit I’ve heard said to me has utterly destroyed my self-confidence.

Anonymous 16h

It is a problem on both sides of the coin, rape itself isn’t handled the the care and seriousness that is mandatory for it. There are some women who genuinely believe that you cannot be raped as a man because you are bigger and stronger than them and could’ve stopped it if you wanted to. That sort of thinking is wrong however. All victims should be treated with the care and kindness they deserve. I think commenter #1 has made a wide over generalization-

Anonymous 12h

It’s a result of women enforcing the patriarchy (men are too strong to be raped, men should have wanted sex anyways).

Anonymous 18h

No one really cares about male troubles, trials or tribulations bro, unfortunately. Unless you have that support system in your life or established loved ones, then it looks incompetent to them when you just cant “handle it”. Women, generally, expect a man (one they may want romantic relations with) to already come preassembled, batteries included; plus dealing with someone’s baggage can be a drag or at least not ideal, no matter what gender you are

Anonymous 11h

Hey man I’m sorry. Hoping for a future where male victims are taken as seriously as they should be 🫶 I’ve seen some women joking about men being assaulted as a kind of revenge for patriarchy, but, that’s not the feminist take they think it is. Intersectionality is supposed to be the core of feminism and we aren’t free until everyone is, and that includes male victims. You are not less of a man, nor did you deserve it, nor should you be told to feel good about it.

Anonymous 11h

I’m very sorry this happened to you fam, and I’m wishing you healing. I think women who say those things, whether they believe them or not, have internalized misogyny, which goes both ways in holding stereotypes. Just remember that it’s not your responsibility to fight these people or convince them <3

Anonymous 7h

Don’t listen to them hoes bruh. Ppl always think men r supposed to be a stoic, lustful monolith but they forget we’re people too.

Anonymous 7h

It definitely depends who you’re talking to. I’m so sorry. Be careful who you’re vulnerable with. Date rape drugs are real and often how women and men are raped and taken control over. 😢

Anonymous 10h

Their dumbasses

Anonymous

#2 16h

- not all women share that sort of thinking same way women saying “all men suck” is an over generalization. But I can understand that it’s hard not to have such a cynical view of the world after being hurt so badly. I want you to know there are kind people out there. People will treat you with kindness you just need to find the right one. All the best to the both of you.

Anonymous

#4 11h

-I hope these people either become better and apologize to you, or stop being in your life. I hope you have a nice night!!

Anonymous

#3 7h

The other part of this is, and it’s a really delicate issue, that people bring up male victims as a way to shut down discussions of how misogyny informs rape culture, even though rape can and does happen to any demographic. So by corollary, people begin to expect someone bringing up a male victim (even himself) to be intentionally derailing a conversation. It’s all spoiled by bad actors and people trying to protect themselves. :/